I have this impression you were trying apps right? Did it work?

what about people who doesn't wanna find someone?
plenty of people enjoy being alone.

I got one late grand uncle
80+ years old stay at home with 2 cars and total contempt
every time I visit sure get some cool antique he collected during the old days

I think he was quite happy with his decision to not get married honestly

yeah I did.
I hate dating apps, but I have to use it cause everyone is doing it
really wish there were no dating app in this world

I know one friend
He is very successful in career
He is smart and very good in choosing everything
insurance, job, pleasing bosses, car, investments

He is good in everyting except ONE
Choosing WIFE
this area, he really sucks
I go to school and college with him, so many girls like him
they tried to woo him
but he not interested
even in the nice girls
why?
because he likes bad girls
really really rotten to the core
So he married one
She is very pretty
but she got a crazy attitude problem
there was once he even considered having an affair in office
Just to get her attention.
so some guys like bad girls with pretty face
they just like to be tortured

that's why you see so many average looking girls
are still single
because guys are suckers to pretty girls
they think with their dicks instead of their brains

I tried that been there done that

didn't qquite like the single life

no friends to mix with
everytime I ask people out, people dread going out with me, maybe because I face problem
even if I didn't show interest in any girls
the very pretty ones, stay far away from me
somehow some crazy girl would come to me, ask me to take her out every day
until I become scared with her constant stalking
and if I try to ask single guys out, they think I trying to homo them
if not homo them, some insecure guy would think I am competition with them for the pretty girls in the group
seriously no fun being single
every day at home, mom nag me.

now married, at least got someone to talk to and do things with.

I am also one year single and thought it shd be better than being in relationship but actually being in relationship is better. If i have 2 options : have someone to love me and dont have anyone to love me, of course I would choose the first one

Maybe another reason i can think of is because of the misleading advice many ppl give out, even in Cupid Corner as well.

That misleading advice is "BE YOURSELF".

For example, if you are boring, then one need to improve himself. Most girls generally dislike guys who are quiet. How are you going to court girls if you are quiet?

One need to attempt to socialise more, there is nothing wrong to socialise more, to talk more, etc.

Unless you can find someone who is compatible with you, that you are very quiet. But that will be a hurdle and time consuming.

Another example, if you are overweight or underweight, then one should attempt to improve himself to reduce weight or increase weight and groom yourself to make yourself attractive.

It is misleading again to say BE YOURSELF without making any attempts to improve yourself.

Unless you are able to find someone who is compatible with you.

So, some ppl might remain single because they listen to the misleading advice BE YOURSELF and forever BE YOURSELF without making any attempts to improve on their personality and their outer appearance.

why dont u make questionaire and distribute to them because if non target people are feedback, that is not represent the actual situation.

1. Some choose such a lifestyle
2. They are independant regardless of gender; so F**k it as "I'm going single since I'm capable and I don't need a partner mentality"
3. Some may not be lucky to score a wife or a husband regardless of circumstances (choosy, introvert .. or worst maybe attitude or character flaw)
4. Queer
5. Companionship is better than marriage trouble .. look at how many stay in together but not married

i shy and dont socialize much
buut mostly is malas to commit to a relationship. scared cannot enjoy hobby like this
i think for me, i will need to find the right person lah

I believe there is a silent majority that want companionship
just that they haven't found one.
in this present life cycle, everyone wants to have career, wants to be successful
no time for marriage n family.
so is really getting harder n harder to find a life partner
so with one's heart still clinging hope to finding a life partner, but haven't found one, most of this silent majority, is Life Goes On.
This is esp very hard for Nons.

sometimes is not about capability, is about needing to share your life with someone
even if it means we take out our money and pamper that person or take our effort to love and do things unconditionally for the person
otherwise how we explain why some single people decided to have a pet
they spend so much money to groom their cat or dog, treat it like their kid.

marriage trouble is very true, but to me, what the heck YOLO. In life there is always Risks. If we don't take the Risks, there is no Rewards. We can mitigate the Risks, by having Wisdom. Wisdom to choose the right partner. Wisdom to take up pre marriage course n prepare oneself to know the expectations of a relationship or marriage. Wisdom to know when to dump a partner when you know things r not going right for the both of you.

the queer factor is very true. They actually not single. They are living a secret life with a same sex partner due to legal issue that same sex marriage or relationship recognition is not recognize here and is viewed with many taboos and also may incur wrath of some vroom vroom people. So they look like single people, but in secrecy they are in relationship.

sometimes these lifestyles are not chosen, is forced upon them. I know a graphic designer freelance, he is quite talented, he sometimes express his desire to be married and start his own family. He is in his 50s. But as a Non, he hasn't found anyone, or anyone remotely interested in him. Also is into his persona, that he is not the type that is all out, gunho to go after girls. He is conservative in heart but in fact, he yearns for a relationship. Just that he hasn't found one and as he ages older, is getting harder n harder to find one. I can relate to him, because I got married late and even started a family very late in age. I found it as a Non hard to find suitable life partner, due to working hours, nons losing desire to get married, etc etc. Until some time back I was able to settle down.

And now I look back, CNY is coming, every CNY, I see more n more of my younger cousins who promote into working life are single. I have to distribute so many ang paus because many remain single. WHat r among the factors ?

1) Queer
2) Some cousins have very bad health issues like diabetic until need injection, probably turn off some very high expectation men
3) IT field makes one behave like a boring n square personality disorder - always looking at phone, ipad or laptop whenever at family gatherings, can't lift a bat eye if you even talk to them.
4) Difficulty to find - got a cousin that is muscular go to gym, got a lot of social friends, still admits difficulty to find life partner
5) give up finding
6) Migration problem - migrated to dead zone Singkie, complain Singkie guys are like spoiled kids.

For 4 is definitely choosy already.

Imagine if you look like Aaron Kwok, you wouldn't want to settle down with some average looking girls or below average look girls anymore.

You would yearn more for some high-class models, that's why "difficult" to find.

Hmm, suspect queer but not admitting maybe

Joke aside, I'm in relationship (LDR) for 8 years and plan for marriage but unfortunately no room for queer here .. so ..

What to do

From young we r brainwashed by hollywood to chase outer beauty

Also porn influence guys to want pink nipple big breast jepunis like women

1. Low self esteem
2. Boring
3. Below average looking
4. Introvert
5. Less female/male friends
6. Traumatize by previous relationship, cheated on, abusive bf/gf, rejection etc
7. Spend most of his/her time working
8. Too shy

yeah i used to believe those kind of advice.
to some extent you do have to believe in yourself but not in everything. Sometimes we have bad traits have to change.

Other misleading advices :
1. "just be yourself and the right one will come eventually" = sometimes true sometimes not. But then again if you are a shitty person, maybe the right one will come in 100 years or never
2. "just keep doing you, do what you love and relationship will come anyway" = sometimes there are ppl so lucky they not looking fr relationship n gets it anyway but sometimes you do need to put effort in looking for relationship. Example if you are a great person but always stay at home never go out, dont socialise, dont use social media/dating app, then how would people find you
3. I hate it when friends say something like "he ghosted you?its because you're too good for him" = no, it means he's not attracted to me, simple as that. that is not a motivational talk, that is bs

too many girl friend. the special girlfriend scared being cheated. even best friend also girl... hahahaha. my case last time la. now married edi.

This post has been edited by edan1979: Jan 6 2021, 02:18 PM

Maybe dont do enough advertisement that your intention to have partner / domestic partnership / scandalship / marriage with someone ? If you dont talk / advertise, how can people read your mind.

As you get older, you get more set in your ways. It is harder to adjust to others.

Relationships take 2, and constant adjustment to each other. When one is younger, there is more room to learn new things, and compromise with each other.

As one gets older, they may get very stubborn, and have formed lifelong habits. It is harder to compromise.

From what I have observed, I think this is why some older people remain single - even if it is involuntary.