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 My Ex-Wife Hates Me

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TSDinKnight
post Sep 27 2019, 09:09 PM, updated 7y ago

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Hi all. I am 36 and have been divorced since 2016.

When I first met her, I thought she was the cutest thing I had every seen and soon we fell in love. However fast forward almost 6 years and after a child, she served me a legal notice to divorce me. I had never cheated on her, but I believe she cheated on me. She wouldn't admit it because I soon found out about that person when she enrolled for her masters at a nearby university.

Despite all the legal battles, I knowingly gave her custody of my child as I knew that is the best option, and divided proceeds of sale of house. Alimony has been given consistently every month and never missed, in fact I even give her extra.

Recently her attitude has changed for the worst and for some reason I have no idea she refuses to communicate with me anymore after a whatsapp argument about her attitude of disrespecting me and lying to my parents about me. It has been a month and I feel very depressed because she refuses to be an adult about things and this has affected me.

What can I do? This is impacting my ability to earn income as I cannot focus. I am always heartbroken and crying inside.

Please help me.
Emimarson
post Sep 27 2019, 09:14 PM

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You should move on, just do the things you should but keep distance, treat her as a stranger.
haturaya
post Sep 27 2019, 09:26 PM

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Elite
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Time to move on. Restart your love life.
xXTAUFANXx
post Sep 27 2019, 09:29 PM

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buat apa nak pening2 kepala nak berkomunikasi bagai.. buat hal masing2 la.. berkomunikasi apabila perlu sahaja berkaitan anak..cuma pastikan dia jalankan tanggungjawab terhadap anak kamu berdua dengan baik..lebih baik kamu meyakinkan orang tuamu yg apa bekas isterimu kata itu semua fitnah daripada bertekak dengan beliau..pasti ibubapa kamu lebih mengenalimu..
perpisahan memang memeritkan lebih2 lagi apabila pasangan kita yang curang.. terimalah kenyataan.. cari pengganti.. pasti ada yg lebih baik di luar sana

This post has been edited by xXTAUFANXx: Sep 27 2019, 09:30 PM
TSDinKnight
post Sep 28 2019, 07:43 PM

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QUOTE(xXTAUFANXx @ Sep 27 2019, 09:29 PM)
buat apa nak pening2 kepala nak berkomunikasi bagai.. buat hal masing2 la.. berkomunikasi apabila perlu sahaja berkaitan anak..cuma pastikan dia jalankan tanggungjawab terhadap anak kamu berdua dengan baik..lebih baik kamu meyakinkan orang tuamu  yg apa bekas isterimu kata itu semua fitnah daripada bertekak dengan beliau..pasti ibubapa kamu lebih mengenalimu..
perpisahan memang memeritkan lebih2 lagi apabila pasangan kita yang curang.. terimalah kenyataan.. cari pengganti.. pasti ada yg lebih baik di luar sana
*
Susah kita sebagai lelaki, kita senang nak maafkan kalau kita sayang dia. Tapi saya memang sakit hati yang teruk, ingat nak pergi counselling sebelum saya buat apa apa yang bawa padah.

xXTAUFANXx
post Sep 28 2019, 08:35 PM

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QUOTE(DinKnight @ Sep 28 2019, 07:43 PM)
Susah kita sebagai lelaki, kita senang nak maafkan kalau kita sayang dia. Tapi saya memang sakit hati yang teruk, ingat nak pergi counselling sebelum saya buat apa apa yang bawa padah.
*
betul bro.. dan langkah tepat utk rujuk diri pakar kaunseling.. apa2pun jangan buat kerja bodoh.. ingat anak..ingat parent..
Fat & Fluffy
post Sep 30 2019, 01:44 PM

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move on... cut off toxic ppl... easier said than done but that's what u gotta tell urself... ur focus now is wat that matters.... ur kid, ur family n urself...
matrix88
post Sep 30 2019, 01:48 PM

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already divorced, no need to think about her anymore, and don't let her hurt you.

MOVE ON, and find someone better
tomato people
post Sep 30 2019, 01:50 PM

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Just ignore her except your child matters...

Restart your love life or focus on living/hobbies

Its okay to cry sometimes to let things out
Pikichu
post Sep 30 2019, 01:55 PM

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Watch the movie, Weather Man, starring Nicholas Cage.
noobz4ever
post Sep 30 2019, 02:00 PM

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Dude, its like u r hoping for her to come back to ur life...
drstranger
post Oct 4 2019, 02:55 PM

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TC, if what you claim is true, then it's not you who's at fault, it's her. As long as you remember that how you live your life should not be dictated by the emotions or will of others, you'll notice that you've actually been granted freedom from this person. You seem like a man of virtue, especially committing to her alimony and that's a sign of a man of virtue. Let that lift you up, knowing full well that you consistently did the right thing.

You can't control how others treat or feel about you, but you CAN control how you react and how you feel about yourself. Practice being virtuous and you'll notice how you're actually more stronger than you'd imagine.
TSDinKnight
post Oct 4 2019, 04:51 PM

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QUOTE(drstranger @ Oct 4 2019, 02:55 PM)
TC, if what you claim is true, then it's not you who's at fault, it's her. As long as you remember that how you live your life should not be dictated by the emotions or will of others, you'll notice that you've actually been granted freedom from this person. You seem like a man of virtue, especially committing to her alimony and that's a sign of a man of virtue. Let that lift you up, knowing full well that you consistently did the right thing.

You can't control how others treat or feel about you, but you CAN control how you react and how you feel about yourself. Practice being virtuous and you'll notice how you're actually more stronger than you'd imagine.
*
Thank you for your kind words sir. Nobody is perfect, but I try my best.

I am over her. Recent events had exposed her true colours. She can don a tudung and pray 5 times a day but based on her actions towards me it all looks like a show to deceive her own family, as she lies about what I supposedly did.

I am moving on with my life and while I may or may not find someone new, what is most important is my child's welfare is taken care of.
kagamistar
post Oct 5 2019, 04:48 PM

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All the best.. You will meet the right person
cringe
post Oct 16 2019, 07:37 PM

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Just forget about her, janji bagi nafkah dekat anak.

That's what matter.


Noryume
post Oct 16 2019, 09:04 PM

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Dia tak nak komunikasi, lupakan aja. Jangan pening² kepala. Kalau nak dia cari, tak yah bayar duit nafkah. Laju la dia contact nanti. Kenapa nak difikirkan dia suka ke tak pada diri tuan? Yang penting kebajikan anak yang perlu diutamakan. Terangkan pada keluarga kalau ada salah faham dengan mereka. Resit nafkah simpan. Cetak elok² letak dalam file. Memang perasaan berharap masih ada. Tapi jangan keterlaluan sampai boleh merosakkan diri sendiri. Kalau dah bercerai ni memang banyak keburukan akan dicanang. Tak kira lelaki atau perempuan. Jangan jatuh ke tahap rendah. Kuatkan diri, moga dipermudahkan dikemudian hari.
marche_ck
post Oct 24 2019, 01:23 AM

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I think she is using you as her emotional punching bag, because she know that you won't, and can't afford to fight back.
shazah P
post Oct 29 2019, 09:56 PM

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QUOTE(DinKnight @ Sep 27 2019, 09:09 PM)
Hi all. I am 36 and have been divorced since 2016.

When I first met her, I thought she was the cutest thing I had every seen and soon we fell in love. However fast forward almost 6 years and after a child, she served me a legal notice to divorce me. I had never cheated on her, but I believe she cheated on me. She wouldn't admit it because I soon found out about that person when she enrolled for her masters at a nearby university.

Despite all the legal battles, I knowingly gave her custody of my child as I knew that is the best option, and divided proceeds of sale of house. Alimony has been given consistently every month and never missed, in fact I even give her extra.

Recently her attitude has changed for the worst and for some reason I have no idea she refuses to communicate with me anymore after a whatsapp argument about her attitude of disrespecting me and lying to my parents about me. It has been a month and I feel very depressed because she refuses to be an adult about things and this has affected me.

What can I do? This is impacting my ability to earn income as I cannot focus. I am always heartbroken and crying inside.

Please help me.
*
Dude seems like borderline personality disorder, seek professional help; there's therapy for this.
InitialB
post Oct 29 2019, 09:58 PM

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You piapx2 tak cukup..

Nafsu dia besar...


 

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