This shows that he could't not let it go of his ex-wife
My bf still keeps all photos of his ex wife
My bf still keeps all photos of his ex wife
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Jun 26 2019, 05:56 PM
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#21
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Probation
6 posts Joined: Jun 2019 |
This shows that he could't not let it go of his ex-wife
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Jun 26 2019, 07:44 PM
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Newbie
36 posts Joined: Jan 2019 |
My gf wanted me to proof my loyalty by deleting all my ex's photos and unfriend her from FB and Instagram.
I did that. She's happy. Yet, i don't understand why. |
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Jun 26 2019, 09:55 PM
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Senior Member
4,727 posts Joined: Mar 2017 |
After deleted then stalked again.. nothing wrong , everything same as IG.
Make sure do not over control by someone |
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Jun 26 2019, 10:59 PM
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Junior Member
76 posts Joined: Jul 2010 |
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Jun 27 2019, 08:24 AM
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Junior Member
492 posts Joined: Aug 2009 |
QUOTE(lzerol @ Jun 26 2019, 07:44 PM) My gf wanted me to proof my loyalty by deleting all my ex's photos and unfriend her from FB and Instagram. No need to understand, there are girls (or majority) like that. Even some may not be too particular about this, but thought this should be default behavior for female, hence they have to react like this. I did that. She's happy. Yet, i don't understand why. In fact, I don't understand why people need to force their spouse/partner do something to proof their love. Forcing a man to delete the photos of his ex, doesn't make him forget his ex and doesn't make him love his current woman more. My guess, one of the biggest mistake that some people have is they thought they own their partner. Personally, I feel everyone is an individual itself and their thought and privacy need to be respect. A marriage is a get together to build a team (family). Should not have a mindset that "You are my husband/wife, you should like this and that". Even as parents, we don't own the kids' thought. These people-have-connection with us, because just like ourself, they also are giving us chances to love them. They may or can also walk out of your life anytime. So, why the need to make it so difficult for them? If they don't feel the need to delete the photo, don't make a drama out of it. By the way, being just gf have what right to demand? Even wife can be ex-wife, a gf is even easier to be ex-gf. Men or women, we live life the way we want, not the way our spouse want. We don't know future, but if you able to make yourself understand that the love we have now may not last forever, therefore do treasure each moment as much as you can. You are hear to craft nice footprint in his memories, not go busy with erasing his old memories. |
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Jun 27 2019, 08:31 AM
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Senior Member
1,893 posts Joined: Nov 2008 |
QUOTE(lzerol @ Jun 26 2019, 08:44 PM) My gf wanted me to proof my loyalty by deleting all my ex's photos and unfriend her from FB and Instagram. my current wife also asked me to throw all the things and deleting all the photos of my ex....I did that. She's happy. Yet, i don't understand why. we even quarrel due to this issue..... so i throw all my ex stuff and now we are happy family... |
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Jun 27 2019, 09:18 AM
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Junior Member
592 posts Joined: Oct 2009 From: Kuala Lumpur |
there isn't much to compare with a 10yrs of relationship versus yours 8mth.. if you understand why and what he is going through, maybe give him time. its almost impossible to forget someone with strong impact in our life.
sometimes true love comes out of trial like this. while both of you are at it, why not make the bond stronger instead of creating doubts? he is trying to let go of his past but at same time trying to juggle emotion while being with you.. |
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Jun 27 2019, 09:22 AM
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Junior Member
216 posts Joined: Jul 2016 |
All my travel photos has my ex wife in them.
I ain't gonna remove them as well cos I want those scenery photos. |
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Jun 27 2019, 11:32 AM
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Junior Member
492 posts Joined: Aug 2009 |
QUOTE(Zoopdiidoo @ Jun 27 2019, 09:22 AM) All my travel photos has my ex wife in them. You better keep it well hidden in your parents' house. Not worry bout her reaction knowing such photo. I ain't gonna remove them as well cos I want those scenery photos. But more worry if she ask you to bring her to all those places and re-take all photoshots to replace the female character in your existing photo. I personally don't mind bout my hubby's past and he too doesn't even bother bout my history. But if I ever get to see such photo.. I will definitely demand him to bring me to those places. I must go places that he went before.. so that wherever he left a footprint, my footprint is there too. On and off, my hubby will recall some places that he went (for food or whatever) and he have this short memories that he thought I was with him. But confirm, I was not the person he brought to those places... ah ha... don't know which gal went with him and becah tembelang. Next, I demand him to bring me there. |
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Jun 27 2019, 11:35 AM
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Senior Member
5,673 posts Joined: Jan 2003 |
QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 26 2019, 08:34 AM) I’m in a relationship with my boyfriend for around 8 months. We do not live together. He still keeps his ex wife’s photos on facebook and in his phone/ laptop, and refuses to remove them. They were with each other for 10 years. He says that he doesn’t have any feeling about her or her pictures but these photos have to be saved because they are his memories and remind him of his past. He actually keeps in touch with his ex wife through facebook and telephone as well. Change to another boyfriend lo even for those wonderful 8 months test drive.I told him that I understand the reason why he keeps those photos and no idea when he and his ex wife still keeps in touch, but I feel uncomfortable when knowing he still keeps them. He mentions that it’s not the end of the world, just because I’m jealous. Please help… I’m literally on the line of being single I don’t want to be with someone who is not over their ex... You deserve the best and it is his loss NOT you. gogogo....Time to Tinder!!! |
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Jun 27 2019, 01:47 PM
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Probation
5 posts Joined: Jun 2019 From: Somewhere over the rainbow |
My bf and his ex officially separated by word of mouth since early 2018. Have not had any kid yet. I trust what he said and what he decide, even it hurt me so much, it's his truth, honesty. I just feel uncomfortable why he's still keeping those photos on his facebook where their friends can view them all the time. He can keep in ubs or hard-disk in his parents' house, right?
#exsea & #LarryPizzaGuy, actually his ex- contacts with him for financial support... I'm just feeling insecure, my sense trying to tell me that he can get back together with his ex wife anytime, if she open her words. |
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Jun 27 2019, 05:12 PM
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Senior Member
4,742 posts Joined: Jan 2012 |
Are they legally divorced yet.
Have they filed the paper work and is now under the 2 years legally separated There is no such thing as word of mouth. Be careful and enter with your eye wide open else you're the one gonna get hurt |
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Jun 27 2019, 05:55 PM
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Probation
1 posts Joined: May 2019 From: Seattle, Washington, US |
QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 26 2019, 08:34 AM) I’m in a relationship with my boyfriend for around 8 months. We do not live together. He still keeps his ex wife’s photos on facebook and in his phone/ laptop, and refuses to remove them. They were with each other for 10 years. He says that he doesn’t have any feeling about her or her pictures but these photos have to be saved because they are his memories and remind him of his past. He actually keeps in touch with his ex wife through facebook and telephone as well. When I read your concern, I understand that you're concerned about loosing him, but what you are not understanding is that if he is cheating on you, there is nothing you can do. I know it is hard for you to digest this fact but dear believe me, you will be far more happy afterwards. It is better to be away from someone who is not bothered with your presence. In your concern above, he also said that "It is not the end of the world". That is your cue dear.I told him that I understand the reason why he keeps those photos and no idea when he and his ex wife still keeps in touch, but I feel uncomfortable when knowing he still keeps them. He mentions that it’s not the end of the world, just because I’m jealous. Please help… I’m literally on the line of being single I don’t want to be with someone who is not over their ex... But still, if you think that you can get him back, then you need to realize the real eyes. Check this simple guide here Cocospyhttps://www.cocospy.com/blog/spy-on-boyfriends-phone-without-touching-it.html I hope you will get all the fortunes in the world dear. Be well. |
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Jun 27 2019, 08:36 PM
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Junior Member
879 posts Joined: Oct 2015 |
QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 27 2019, 01:47 PM) My bf and his ex officially separated by word of mouth since early 2018. Have not had any kid yet. I trust what he said and what he decide, even it hurt me so much, it's his truth, honesty. I just feel uncomfortable why he's still keeping those photos on his facebook where their friends can view them all the time. He can keep in ubs or hard-disk in his parents' house, right? I'm sorry to say that, you are the side chick to him (in this scenario). Your bf will (and at any given moment) will return to his ex-wife if the condition is just right.#exsea & #LarryPizzaGuy, actually his ex- contacts with him for financial support... I'm just feeling insecure, my sense trying to tell me that he can get back together with his ex wife anytime, if she open her words. If your bf is serious with his divorce, they would've gone through the proper channel and divorce officially on paper. --------------------------------------------- Have you talked with your bf about this? How serious is he of being with you in a relationship? If YES, has he proven to you yet? --------------------------------------------- Or, on the other-hand. Are you the reason why your bf is currently separated from his ex-wife? How serious are you of being with him in a relationship? If YES, are you willing to live with the truth that you will be the one who will pull your bf further away from his ex-wife (and eventually, hopefully, divorce officially)? Keep this in mind that, since this divorce case has happened to his ex-wife; there is a chance that it will happen to you as well; since your bf have the luxury of choosing between 2 women NOW; he will do it again in the future (if you might not have live up to his expectation). --------------------------------------------- My advise.... just break it off with him and save yourself from a troubled future with him. I believe you're still young; and time is on your side to choose a right partner for your future. It is better to leave now (as a girlfriend), rather than as his future wife. |
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Jun 27 2019, 08:39 PM
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#35
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Senior Member
1,004 posts Joined: Oct 2007 |
QUOTE(LarryPizzaGuy @ Jun 27 2019, 08:36 PM) Well, at least we have the answer to this question.QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 26 2019, 08:34 AM) QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 27 2019, 01:47 PM) |
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Jun 27 2019, 09:03 PM
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Probation
5 posts Joined: Jun 2019 From: Somewhere over the rainbow |
@LarryPizzaGuy: no, I'm not the reason of their separation. I didn't know his ex wife until I saw her photos on facebook. She still marks their "marriage" event and many photos there.
I trust what he told me about the reason of separation, personality differences in marriage. I'm only afraid that he can get back together with her anytime, if she open her words. And I can't express my feelings with him, because when I mention her in our conversation, he doesn't want me to ask questions about her, or if I do ask questions, they go unanswered. Actually, I feel threatened by their relationship. |
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Jun 27 2019, 09:38 PM
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#37
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Senior Member
1,004 posts Joined: Oct 2007 |
QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 27 2019, 09:03 PM) @LarryPizzaGuy: no, I'm not the reason of their separation. I didn't know his ex wife until I saw her photos on facebook. She still marks their "marriage" event and many photos there. So, he has not official divorced, is very flippant about your feelings, not very serious in this relationship, and the (ex) wife probably does not know he has a gf. I trust what he told me about the reason of separation, personality differences in marriage. I'm only afraid that he can get back together with her anytime, if she open her words. And I can't express my feelings with him, because when I mention her in our conversation, he doesn't want me to ask questions about her, or if I do ask questions, they go unanswered. Actually, I feel threatened by their relationship. Yeah, your relationship is threatened alright. |
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Jun 27 2019, 11:58 PM
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Junior Member
879 posts Joined: Oct 2015 |
QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 27 2019, 09:03 PM) @LarryPizzaGuy: no, I'm not the reason of their separation. I didn't know his ex wife until I saw her photos on facebook. She still marks their "marriage" event and many photos there. They were together longer and way before you. Hence their relationship will always be stronger than you...I trust what he told me about the reason of separation, personality differences in marriage. I'm only afraid that he can get back together with her anytime, if she open her words. And I can't express my feelings with him, because when I mention her in our conversation, he doesn't want me to ask questions about her, or if I do ask questions, they go unanswered. Actually, I feel threatened by their relationship. Unless however.. your bf is willing to let his ex-wife go, and divorce officially. Try looking from the ex-wife's perspective, she would've felt threatened by your relationship with your bf. You will feel threatened as well if a new person comes along (younger, sexier, smarter, wealthier, or just BETTER than you) and take your partner away. -------------------------------------------------------- What I see is that there are 2 women who has been played by a selfish man. Your bf is selfish; he is selfish for stringing his ex-wife along; wasting her youth while never wanted to fully commit to her. Your bf is selfish; for having you as a side dish, waiting for you to mature; if you don't, he will always have his ex-wife to fall back on. You will always be his side pet project. I see that your bf is not an honest and loyal man; he is selfish; he doesn't care for you or his ex-wife; he only cares about his needs If he is not selfish, he would not have put you two women in this situation. The way forward is simple, if your bf wants a new girl, just divorce his ex-wife and let her free; or commit himself to his ex-wife. There is no what-if-this or what-if-that situation. The answer is simple and straight forward. Your bf is selfish by keeping his women options open/ ------------------------------------------------------- However, I can be proven wrong. That you would be the one who started it all. I hope I was wrong about this. ------------------------------------------------------- I personally feel that you and the ex-wife are both innocent and have been manipulated by this selfish man in the first place. I've seen and been with enough women who have been tormented by the ex-lover. I hope he (the bf) doesn't reproduce, as he will be a terrible father. |
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Jun 28 2019, 02:02 AM
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Junior Member
93 posts Joined: Jun 2015 |
I would be concerned that he still keeps in regular contact.. has he shown you the messages?
Does the ex wife know you are dating him? |
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Jun 28 2019, 09:44 AM
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Junior Member
656 posts Joined: May 2005 |
QUOTE(wargreymon12 @ Jun 28 2019, 02:02 AM) I would be concerned that he still keeps in regular contact.. has he shown you the messages? Does the ex wife know you are dating him? QUOTE(Jacalyn Su @ Jun 27 2019, 09:03 PM) @LarryPizzaGuy: no, I'm not the reason of their separation. I didn't know his ex wife until I saw her photos on facebook. She still marks their "marriage" event and many photos there. I trust what he told me about the reason of separation, personality differences in marriage. I'm only afraid that he can get back together with her anytime, if she open her words. And I can't express my feelings with him, because when I mention her in our conversation, he doesn't want me to ask questions about her, or if I do ask questions, they go unanswered. Actually, I feel threatened by their relationship. |
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