Been seeing a boy 9 years my junior for a month, there's a mutual attraction between both parties but we're both playing the waiting game (or so I think).
Thing about this is I never intended for feelings to be involved, but his behaviors did warm my heart and I developed a brotherly affection for him, and at this point something a little more than that but less of a romantic attraction. I'd be interested in getting to know him further but I'm not sure if he feels the same.
It's a little hard to initiate conversations with him because we don't share a lot of common topics to talk about and at the same time, I'm a little too hesitant to ask anything in fear of coming across as annoying or borderline creepy.
However, this kid has asked me to visit him whenever he's performing (performing arts student) and we've gone out on at least once with one another. Funny part is he doesn't reject my presence but he isn't exactly desperate for me to be around either.
Now before I get to the main question, here are a few disclaimers:
1) I am not a pedophile or a child groomer, I gravitate towards older men but alas, this kid stirred up feelings in me that I haven't felt since my ex
2) The boy is way more experienced than I am in the areas of being gay (?), he's explored his sexuality, had sex and is comfortable with his sexual orientation whereas I'm the complete opposite.
3) I am acutely aware of the age gap, and thus, refrain from anything physical from him.
4) I am completely aware that there is a possibility that nothing good will come out of this and that's okay because I'm happy just watching him grow and mature
5) I am also aware of the implications that come along, legal wise though I'm not too afraid of that since neither of us have crossed the line and I've already gone through some backlash.
6) If things do culminate in a relationship, I'm confident things will not last long due to our respective life plans but I see that there's some life lessons for both of us to gain from said relationship.
So for the past one month, it's basically me buying desserts for him whenever I see him and he's always happy to see me.
Thing is, I'm not exactly sure what to do now and more importantly, I'm not sure if he's expecting me to make the first move. I'm not one to make the first move but it seems it's come to a point where the kid seems oblivious to my advances . Sometimes he keeps asking me why am I being so nice to him and I'm not exactly sure how to respond. I did casually mention once that I was interested in him, but he has explicitly stated he's not looking to go into a relationship since he's got SPM and his tournaments going.
My question is, do I tell him a second time that I'm interested in him? Or should I continue to play the waiting game until he gives me a much more concrete sign? I was pretty darn sure it was a one-sided affection, but it seems as of late, he's been very responsive to my presence but does not initiate anything with me. I would think if he found me annoying, he would have told me off long ago.
Again, not expecting anything out of this but I do think maybe it's worthwhile talking about him and I. I just don't know how to do it in such a way that it's child-friendly, if that makes sense. If he seems certain about not reciprocating my feelings, great. I'll just look out for him like a close friend and coach him with his SPM syllabus. If he is interested in me and has been expecting me to make the first move, what do I do then?
Can I get some perspectives?
This post has been edited by MerryGoRound^2: Jun 20 2019, 07:29 PM
Seeing a teenager, When's the right time to pop the qn?