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go for interests/connection or caring/niceness?
TSY_vonne
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Jun 18 2019, 06:53 PM, updated 5y ago
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Getting Started
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Ok, so would you go for
A) a guy who shares the same interests with you, and you feel like you connect with him and know him already. You have that “click” with him. You just feel comfortable and yourself around him even if you only know him. BUT, he doesnt really know how to care for you, and really you’re the one making all the decisions, and you don’t feel like you’re protected around him but you’re the one having to do the protecting instead
Or
B) a guy who cares for you and protects you and is really nice. He does things a guy does and is really sweet. But, you guys dont really share the same interests. But you guys talk and have fun but maybe it isnt that strong of a connection or instant click.
So yeah which is more important in a relationship and which would you go for
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SGSuser
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Jun 18 2019, 10:59 PM
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go with ur heart
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J1g54w
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Jun 18 2019, 11:21 PM
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QUOTE(Y_vonne @ Jun 18 2019, 06:53 PM) Ok, so would you go for A) a guy who shares the same interests with you, and you feel like you connect with him and know him already. You have that “click” with him. You just feel comfortable and yourself around him even if you only know him. BUT, he doesnt really know how to care for you, and really you’re the one making all the decisions, and you don’t feel like you’re protected around him but you’re the one having to do the protecting instead Or B) a guy who cares for you and protects you and is really nice. He does things a guy does and is really sweet. But, you guys dont really share the same interests. But you guys talk and have fun but maybe it isnt that strong of a connection or instant click. So yeah which is more important in a relationship and which would you go for Imagine if suddenly both stopped seeing, messaging or calling you, who will you miss more? You got the answer.
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Zoo Howl
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Jun 19 2019, 12:41 AM
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From the way u write & describe, i would suggest A
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Yggdrasil
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Jun 19 2019, 01:21 AM
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Depends on whether you prefer to love more or to be loved more.
Same interests can be boring at times.
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TSY_vonne
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Jun 19 2019, 10:32 AM
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Getting Started
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QUOTE(J1g54w @ Jun 18 2019, 11:21 PM) Imagine if suddenly both stopped seeing, messaging or calling you, who will you miss more? You got the answer. Damn. QUOTE(Zoo Howl @ Jun 19 2019, 12:41 AM) From the way u write & describe, i would suggest A But if u know that if you go for A, you somehow will not be satisfied with what he do, and worry that he’s not doing enough all the time. So it will go to shit again. Well i just feel like sometimes two people that wanna be together, people call it your “soulmate” but somehow the universe just says no, for some weird reason.
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BuddhawithinMe
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Jun 19 2019, 10:52 AM
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Getting Started
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I would go for no2.
No. 1 is good for being close friend.
After all, girls always wanted someone who is decisive and protective to feel secured.
No matter how tough we look on the outside, there always a fragile side inside us.
Just my opinions.
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cc980024
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Jun 19 2019, 11:04 AM
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Option A - I never have such bf/ex-bf Option B - have 1 before but I dumped him coz his unconditional love makes me feel boring. But I marry Option C, have common mindset but no common hobbies and don't know how to care of me. But knowing myself well, a guy of option B who cares for me too much (experience with ex-bf) will only drive me away.
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Zero Correlation
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Jun 20 2019, 06:58 PM
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New Member
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I've always say I wanted A. But I ended up with B for reasons I can't explain
All I can say is, there will be a void geh. Depends on how you fill that void lor. I fill it with like minded friends
Option A also will have void when you see your friends with caring partner. Every now and then my girl friends will comment on how my husband takes care of me
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ViktorJ
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Jun 20 2019, 08:20 PM
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Although we tend to judge based on what is currently in front of us, we must remember that situations are highly dynamic. Over time:
A can become B B can become A A or B can become AB A or B can also become useless humkaling one day
The importance of either interest or security is highly subjective, as it is based on your own current situation (if you have many social buddies of similar interest, A is not so important, likewise if you are highly independent, then B is mostly redundant).
Objectively, the balance of power shifts depending on your choice, as I am certain you know what I mean.
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TSY_vonne
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Jun 21 2019, 07:23 AM
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Getting Started
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Wondering if it would be a shitty move to let go of A when A is basically the same person as you and share the same thoughts with you.. and as cringe as it may sound but “finish each others sentence”. but maybe..a little too same. As in A couldn't be that bigger person in a relationship, he needed to be the one being protected, and same goes to you, you couldnt be the protector, not in a relationship. Maybe u ll never find someone quite like him anymore, was it stupid to let him go.
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SUSMalboroLight
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Jun 21 2019, 09:51 AM
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New Member
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why not both?
joke aside, pick the one which is wealthier.
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McFD2R
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Jun 21 2019, 04:45 PM
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QUOTE(Y_vonne @ Jun 18 2019, 06:53 PM) Ok, so would you go for A) a guy who shares the same interests with you, and you feel like you connect with him and know him already. You have that “click” with him. You just feel comfortable and yourself around him even if you only know him. BUT, he doesnt really know how to care for you, and really you’re the one making all the decisions, and you don’t feel like you’re protected around him but you’re the one having to do the protecting instead Or B) a guy who cares for you and protects you and is really nice. He does things a guy does and is really sweet. But, you guys dont really share the same interests. But you guys talk and have fun but maybe it isnt that strong of a connection or instant click. So yeah which is more important in a relationship and which would you go for Neither. Why does it have to A or B? Look for C that may have both. To accept either when in doubt is a recipe for failure. Are you in a rush? Biological clock ticking? If you choose either, it's called .... SETTLING FOR
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vhs1
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Jun 22 2019, 01:24 AM
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Good boys go to heaven, bad boys bring the heaven to you
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ViktorJ
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Jun 22 2019, 01:56 AM
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QUOTE(vhs1 @ Jun 22 2019, 01:24 AM) Good boys go to heaven, bad boys bring the heaven to you Bad boys are selfish AF. Why should they bother to bring heaven to anyone but themselves? By the way, did you post in the wrong thread?
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veron4best
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Jun 25 2019, 10:57 AM
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QUOTE(Y_vonne @ Jun 18 2019, 06:53 PM) Ok, so would you go for A) a guy who shares the same interests with you, and you feel like you connect with him and know him already. You have that “click” with him. You just feel comfortable and yourself around him even if you only know him. BUT, he doesnt really know how to care for you, and really you’re the one making all the decisions, and you don’t feel like you’re protected around him but you’re the one having to do the protecting instead Or B) a guy who cares for you and protects you and is really nice. He does things a guy does and is really sweet. But, you guys dont really share the same interests. But you guys talk and have fun but maybe it isnt that strong of a connection or instant click. So yeah which is more important in a relationship and which would you go for u describe A more than B. so is A the answer.
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TSY_vonne
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Jun 27 2019, 05:47 PM
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Getting Started
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Lets add a scenario
A left you. And while you lost A, you found B, but A comes back asking to try again.
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ViktorJ
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Jun 27 2019, 06:07 PM
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QUOTE(Y_vonne @ Jun 27 2019, 05:47 PM) Lets add a scenario A left you. And while you lost A, you found B, but A comes back asking to try again. What is the current situation with B?
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fearless_kiki
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Jun 27 2019, 06:15 PM
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Getting Started
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QUOTE(Y_vonne @ Jun 27 2019, 05:47 PM) Lets add a scenario A left you. And while you lost A, you found B, but A comes back asking to try again. Ask A go fly kite. Seriously why do you want someone that treats you like trash? (once dumped you)
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ViktorJ
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Jun 27 2019, 06:16 PM
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QUOTE(fearless_kiki @ Jun 27 2019, 06:15 PM) Ask A go fly kite. Seriously why do you want someone that treats you like trash? (once dumped you) Ha yeah, I agree with this.
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