Welcome Guest ( Log In | Register )

4 Pages  1 2 3 > » Bottom

Outline · [ Standard ] · Linear+

 I found "The One" but she is with someONE else

views
     
TSbryanhwm
post Jan 23 2019, 01:40 PM, updated 6y ago

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
207 posts

Joined: Mar 2010
Need someone to talk to cause all my other friends gave up on me.

I met this girl in the year of 2017. She caught my attention then caught my heart, vice versa. She is everything I look for in a girl. I MEANT EVERYTHING!

With her, I was more organised, I was more aggressive in my work & I was full of energy.

We meet every weekday but now we still see each other daily (because of work), straightly work.

I've been fetching her everyday for the 6 months straight. 20KM to her place and another 28KM to work, back and forth.

We had dinner almost every day. We even spend random weekends together. And we for sure either spend time on face-time or on call daily.

We are not a couple but I've introduced to her all my bestie(s), next in line was my family.

Majority label us as a couple.

After sweet 6 months, all hell broke loose, her ex found out she is seeing someone else, he forced himself back into her life by playing the pity card. Even tried to play the bigger man role by offering any sort of help if he can (i went into a car accident at that time).

She went back to him but at the same time holding on to me, she hopes she can fix him then come back to me, but at the end, she left me for good to be with him.

But she left me something, a statement that one day, if she manage to leave him for good, she wish to be come back to me.

I still enjoy seeing her smile, I still get her presents for her birthday and Christmas.

Sometimes when I see her frown, I knew something was wrong, but I do not dare to ask "how are you".

Lately I've been dreaming of her and had been revisiting some of our old photos.

I do not dare to admit to my close friends that I still miss her so I often lie to them.

But this past is affecting me to actually look for new love, cause unconsciously I always do comparison.

confused.gif cry.gif blush.gif mega_shok.gif
Baconateer
post Jan 23 2019, 01:45 PM

Meh..... (TM)
*******
Senior Member
4,874 posts

Joined: Jun 2013
From: Blue Planet


and... when is she going to leave him?

just move on with ur life..

how long are u gonna wait?
Jack Floyd
post Jan 23 2019, 01:46 PM

New Member
*
Junior Member
9 posts

Joined: Nov 2008


Ask yourself, what you can give up for her?

ViktorJ
post Jan 23 2019, 01:50 PM

Dancy Drinky Doggo
******
Senior Member
1,004 posts

Joined: Oct 2007
Before you get about 5,000 "spare tire" comments, I would like to say that comparing to someone you really love and put on a pedestal is natural. Can totally understand that.

But one day, you will realize that although it does not feel like it, there are better ones out there.

How to find them?

Be #1 and #2 on my signature.

Not only is this a lost cause, she is no longer yours, and even if she DOES come back, you are just option B, and you do not want to realize that one day.

It really sucks that you have to meet her everyday though.

You may PM me for more if you like.
keyser soze
post Jan 23 2019, 01:51 PM

On my way
****
Junior Member
521 posts

Joined: Jul 2007
Nothing you can do. Just be a better man, better courier, look and etc.
zidane28
post Jan 23 2019, 01:52 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
268 posts

Joined: Mar 2008


QUOTE
But she left me something, a statement that one day, if she manage to leave him for good, she wish to be come back to me.


So she thought of you as a spare tyre?

The way I see it? Even she get married later and have some prob in her daily normal gaduh, when she call u saying that she need friends to talk with, you will fly straight to her, listen to her, advise her etc, then after she feel better, she will just say thanks and go back to her husband while you go back feeling empty.

You are hopeless my friend...

She obviously still like her ex...Nope, now is officially back to couple aren't they?

I really don't know what you still hoping for.

Go straight to her, confess to her, and ask her make a choice.

If not you, just leave, love is cruel sometimes, but it will be more cruel if you keep hanging like this.
TarePanda
post Jan 23 2019, 02:01 PM

Enthusiast
*****
Senior Member
989 posts

Joined: Sep 2004


QUOTE(bryanhwm @ Jan 23 2019, 01:40 PM)
Need someone to talk to cause all my other friends gave up on me.

I met this girl in the year of 2017. She caught my attention then caught my heart, vice versa. She is everything I look for in a girl. I MEANT EVERYTHING!

With her, I was more organised, I was more aggressive in my work & I was full of energy.

We meet every weekday but now we still see each other daily (because of work), straightly work.

I've been fetching her everyday for the 6 months straight. 20KM to her place and another 28KM to work, back and forth.

We had dinner almost every day. We even spend random weekends together. And we for sure either spend time on face-time or on call daily.

We are not a couple but I've introduced to her all my bestie(s), next in line was my family.

Majority label us as a couple.

After sweet 6 months, all hell broke loose, her ex found out she is seeing someone else, he forced himself back into her life by playing the pity card. Even tried to play the bigger man role by offering any sort of help if he can (i went into a car accident at that time).

She went back to him but at the same time holding on to me, she hopes she can fix him then come back to me, but at the end, she left me for good to be with him.

But she left me something, a statement that one day, if she manage to leave him for good, she wish to be come back to me.

I still enjoy seeing her smile, I still get her presents for her birthday and Christmas.

Sometimes when I see her frown, I knew something was wrong, but I do not dare to ask "how are you".

Lately I've been dreaming of her and had been revisiting some of our old photos.

I do not dare to admit to my close friends that I still miss her so I often lie to them.

But this past is affecting me to actually look for new love, cause unconsciously I always do comparison.

confused.gif  cry.gif  blush.gif  mega_shok.gif
*
What the hell.....got time to write here but no guts to fight back?

If you think she is the one, fight back and don't give up

TBJ
post Jan 23 2019, 02:03 PM

Casual
***
Junior Member
374 posts

Joined: Sep 2014


1.look for a new one, new will let you forget old one.
2. if she sees you're seeing new girls, and she has no reaction, means you have make the right choice.
3. if you loves the new one more than the old one sincerely, you will be able to leave the old one, just remembering her once awhile.
tomato people
post Jan 23 2019, 02:04 PM

Tomato fan
******
Senior Member
1,612 posts

Joined: Jul 2016
From: tomato land


QUOTE(kipas_lipas @ Jan 23 2019, 02:00 PM)
U just a bounce guy.. go find another pussy.. office romance never work..
*
Can work...but must be different department and reporting boss


kuladruw
post Jan 23 2019, 02:08 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
150 posts

Joined: Jan 2019
QUOTE(bryanhwm @ Jan 23 2019, 01:40 PM)
Need someone to talk to cause all my other friends gave up on me.

I met this girl in the year of 2017. She caught my attention then caught my heart, vice versa. She is everything I look for in a girl. I MEANT EVERYTHING!

With her, I was more organised, I was more aggressive in my work & I was full of energy.

We meet every weekday but now we still see each other daily (because of work), straightly work.

I've been fetching her everyday for the 6 months straight. 20KM to her place and another 28KM to work, back and forth.

We had dinner almost every day. We even spend random weekends together. And we for sure either spend time on face-time or on call daily.

We are not a couple but I've introduced to her all my bestie(s), next in line was my family.

Majority label us as a couple.

After sweet 6 months, all hell broke loose, her ex found out she is seeing someone else, he forced himself back into her life by playing the pity card. Even tried to play the bigger man role by offering any sort of help if he can (i went into a car accident at that time).

She went back to him but at the same time holding on to me, she hopes she can fix him then come back to me, but at the end, she left me for good to be with him.

But she left me something, a statement that one day, if she manage to leave him for good, she wish to be come back to me.

I still enjoy seeing her smile, I still get her presents for her birthday and Christmas.

Sometimes when I see her frown, I knew something was wrong, but I do not dare to ask "how are you".

Lately I've been dreaming of her and had been revisiting some of our old photos.

I do not dare to admit to my close friends that I still miss her so I often lie to them.

But this past is affecting me to actually look for new love, cause unconsciously I always do comparison.

confused.gif  cry.gif  blush.gif  mega_shok.gif
*
3 of u just get together. so she will had sex with 2 guys at the same time

3 ppl better than 2, easy to split house chores, if one of you sick 2 ppl take turn to care, its easier, 3 ppl pay house loan, split money related investment, less risk, return higher, etc

This post has been edited by kuladruw: Jan 23 2019, 02:10 PM
newbzie
post Jan 23 2019, 02:09 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
182 posts

Joined: Mar 2013


Why do people always ask these questions when they really know the answer in their deepest point of their souls. It's almost to the point of asking for validation of what you already know.

It's always called a backup plan , or plan b if in case the things don't work out.
You're the plan B in this case.

You already went out of your way to fetch her , and i hope you've stopped doing this. The obligation isn't yours anymore and the baton has been passed on.

I hope you move on from this but the chances are you will revert to the shell of what you are. To chase a dream which won't be yours. On the offhand the Gods of Fate are on your side, if she does come back after breaking up with you , you should be able to say "Thanks but I'm with someone else now"
Ralna
post Jan 23 2019, 02:53 PM

Casual
***
Junior Member
388 posts

Joined: Sep 2012


QUOTE(bryanhwm @ Jan 23 2019, 01:40 PM)
I met this girl in the year of 2017. She caught my attention then caught my heart, vice versa. She is everything I look for in a girl. I MEANT EVERYTHING!
With her, I was more organised, I was more aggressive in my work & I was full of energy.

We meet every weekday but now we still see each other daily (because of work), straightly work.
I've been fetching her everyday for the 6 months straight. 20KM to her place and another 28KM to work, back and forth.
We had dinner almost every day. We even spend random weekends together. And we for sure either spend time on face-time or on call daily.

We are not a couple but I've introduced to her all my bestie(s), next in line was my family.

Majority label us as a couple.
*
TS bodoh. You had 6 months to confess to her, officiate the relationship and make her yours permanently, BUT...??

WHY DIDN'T YOU DO IT??

You gave her ex-bf a chance to win her back. It is YOUR OWN FAULT. What's the point of crying over spilt milk now?

& why didn't you man up to win her back from the ex?? They broke up long ago.

You're too soft.

This post has been edited by Ralna: Jan 23 2019, 02:57 PM
TSbryanhwm
post Jan 23 2019, 02:54 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
207 posts

Joined: Mar 2010
Thanks for all the concern and comment and not flaming too hard.

Allow me to clear a few issues ya; so keep calm ya.

1. I no longer fetching her anymore it was a like most 1year+ ago incident. We barely even speak now except for work

2. No, I'm waiting for her. But her statement just stuck to me. And becaise we still meet everyday, it's tought to not think about it.

3. I personally dont felt like I was the spare tire because during the 6 months, we spend almost every time together. Is when the ex suddenly pop out and play the pity card, she was forced (well half willingly go back to him)

4. She explained why she left me into her life and yes I took the explaination very seriously.

I'm not extending my actions to do more for her, but as for her birthday and Christimas, I myself willingly give it ot her. Just to see a sec a smile that was caused by me.

I do not text her, I even deleted our whole 6 months chat in her phone for her because she said he constantly trying to see her phone.

I'm not hoping she will come back to me.

I'm not hoping for anything.

I just miss the old us, where I was happy, where I can find my calm corner.

Quote from somehwere :

Love : The word means caring someone beyond all rationality and wanting them to have everything they want. No matter how much it destorys you. And when you love someone, you don't stop, ever. Even the people around you disagree with you, roll their eyes and even calls you stupid. Even then you don't give up, because if it could be so easily given up, move on and find someone else, that wouldn't be love. It would be just another disposable thing and isn't worth fighting in the first place.
Pete the great
post Jan 23 2019, 02:56 PM

On my way
****
Junior Member
519 posts

Joined: Jul 2013
You were her door mat.

Well, she likely saw her ex was driving a bigger car and had more dough than you.

In the end, was a worth it ?

Hell no.

She is a beech, move on.
TSbryanhwm
post Jan 23 2019, 02:59 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
207 posts

Joined: Mar 2010
QUOTE(Ralna @ Jan 23 2019, 02:53 PM)
TS bodoh. You had 6 months to confess to her, officiate the relationship and make her yours permanently, BUT...??

WHY DIDN'T YOU DO IT??

You gave her ex-bf a chance to win her back. It is YOUR OWN FAULT.  What's the point of crying over spilt milk now?

& why didn't you man up to win her back from the ex?? They broke up long ago.

You're too soft.
*
I did. But his pity card was just too ridiculous and she still in love with him even she did not admit it.
Pete the great
post Jan 23 2019, 03:00 PM

On my way
****
Junior Member
519 posts

Joined: Jul 2013
Your title remind me of my mum last time bought 4 ekor.

She bought 2414 but the prize came out as 2413.

Then she told me, aiyah I almost won 1st prize.

I really face palm
cc980024
post Jan 23 2019, 03:01 PM

Casual
***
Junior Member
492 posts

Joined: Aug 2009
Who is fetching her to work now? Still you or her bf?
If is her bf fetching her to work now, she reserving you .. incase she break up again, she got you to fetch her. If you are still fetching her.. she saying that hoping to keep her driver.

Always remember, girl who in need of transport may try to maintain friendship/relationship as much as possible. I used to be a girl who took public transport to/fr uni and until 1 day, a guy started to offer me a bike-ride daily. Even though I know he likes me (and he is not my cup of tea), I maintain good relationship with him. I believe some of his friends may tell him the same thing that this girl only wanna tumpang motor, but the guy will not believe it as the girl he admire all along have been taking public transport, not that kind that tumpang tumpang. But sorry to say, it is ok to take bus, but once you started to have free ride, nobody likes to go back to public transport.

In my current office, have the same example too. A girl used to tumpang my peer's car to LRT station. And she share her breakfast and fruits to him.. like good buddies (the guy is married). But after we have another guy join the company, she got hook up with the new guy and he fetch her along to work. Since then, no more breakfast and fruits for my peer. It is ok seeing that ppl now dating. But 2 yrs later, that guy quit. So the fruits and breakfast suddenly appear on my peer's desk. Next thing she request him to send her home (not to LRT station anymore, as her bf send her direct to home.. used to it). We.. (the batch of women in office) warn my peer.. if he ever fetch her.. we will call up his wife. Wakakaka.

TS, wake up.. There are girls like that. If she really care for you and consider your feeling. She should apologise to you, and not telling you that if it didn't work out with her bf, she will wish to come back to you. Obviously telling you "Mr., stay there be my backup".
Aftermaths
post Jan 23 2019, 03:02 PM

On my way
****
Junior Member
575 posts

Joined: Apr 2012


QUOTE(bryanhwm @ Jan 23 2019, 02:59 PM)
I did. But his pity card was just too ridiculous and she still in love with him even she did not admit it.
*
Since the Ex-bf use pity card.

I suggest you use Jealous card.

Reject all invitation from whole office, let other know you seeing another girl.

After that, ask "How are you" to your colleague.


You should not let female think you are door mat / floating balloon waiting for her.

This post has been edited by Aftermaths: Jan 23 2019, 03:03 PM
TSbryanhwm
post Jan 23 2019, 03:03 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
207 posts

Joined: Mar 2010
QUOTE(Ralna @ Jan 23 2019, 02:53 PM)
TS bodoh. You had 6 months to confess to her, officiate the relationship and make her yours permanently, BUT...??

WHY DIDN'T YOU DO IT??

You gave her ex-bf a chance to win her back. It is YOUR OWN FAULT.  What's the point of crying over spilt milk now?

& why didn't you man up to win her back from the ex?? They broke up long ago.

You're too soft.
*
I did. But his pity card was just too ridiculous and she still in love with him even she did not admit it.
ViktorJ
post Jan 23 2019, 03:04 PM

Dancy Drinky Doggo
******
Senior Member
1,004 posts

Joined: Oct 2007
QUOTE(cc980024 @ Jan 23 2019, 03:01 PM)
Who is fetching her to work now? Still you or her bf?
If is her bf fetching her to work now, she reserving you .. incase she break up again, she got you to fetch her. If you are still fetching her.. she saying that hoping to keep her driver.

Always remember, girl who in need of transport may try to maintain friendship/relationship as much as possible. I used to be a girl who took public transport to/fr uni and until 1 day, a guy started to offer me a bike-ride daily. Even though I know he likes me (and he is not my cup of tea), I maintain good relationship with him. I believe some of his friends may tell him the same thing that this girl only wanna tumpang motor, but the guy will not believe it as the girl he admire all along have been taking public transport, not that kind that tumpang tumpang. But sorry to say, it is ok to take bus, but once you started to have free ride, nobody likes to go back to public transport.

In my current office, have the same example too. A girl used to tumpang my peer's car to LRT station. And she share her breakfast and fruits to him.. like good buddies (the guy is married). But after we have another guy join the company, she got hook up with the new guy and he fetch her along to work. Since then, no more breakfast and fruits for my peer. It is ok seeing that ppl now dating. But 2 yrs later, that guy quit. So the fruits and breakfast suddenly appear on my peer's desk. Next thing she request him to send her home (not to LRT station anymore, as her bf send her direct to home.. used to it). We.. (the batch of women in office) warn my peer.. if he ever fetch her.. we will call up his wife. Wakakaka.

TS, wake up.. There are girls like that. If she really care for you and consider your feeling. She should apologise to you, and not telling you that if it didn't work out with her bf, she will wish to come back to you. Obviously telling you "Mr., stay there be my backup".
*
QUOTE(bryanhwm @ Jan 23 2019, 02:54 PM)
1. I no longer fetching her anymore it was a like most 1year+ ago incident. We barely even speak now except for work
*

4 Pages  1 2 3 > » Top
 

Change to:
| Lo-Fi Version
0.0177sec    0.57    6 queries    GZIP Disabled
Time is now: 28th March 2024 - 10:02 PM