*HOW ENGLISH AND ENGLISHMEN MAKE FUN OF EACH OTHER*

*Enjoy the fun & the pun.*

*Q: Can February March?*
*A: No. But April May!*

*Q: Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalised?*
*A: Reports say it was due to too many strokes!*

*Q: Have you heard the joke about the butter?*
*A: I better not tell you, it might spread!*

*Q: How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?*
*A: Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?*

*Q: Music Teacher: What's your favourite musical instrument?*
*A: Kid: The lunch bell!*

*Q: What did the triangle say to the circle?*
*A: You’re pointless!*

*Q: What do you call a ghosts mom and dad?*
*A: Transparents!*

*Q: What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut?*
*A: A Barbercue!*

*Q: What do you call a person that chops up cereal*
*A: A cereal killer!*

*Q: What do you call a South American girl who is always in a hurry?*
*A: Urgent Tina!*

*Q: What do you call two fat people having a chat?*
*A: A heavy discussion!*

*Q: What kind of emotions do noses feel?*
*A: Nostalgia!*

*Q: What kind of shorts do clouds wear?*
*A: Thunderwear!*

*Q: What's easy to get into but hard to get out of?*
*A: Trouble!*

*Q: Where do boats go to when they get sick?*
*A: The dock!*

*Q: Who cleans the bottom of the ocean?*
*A: A Mer-Maid!*

*Q: Why can't a leopard hide?*
*A: Because he's always spotted!*

*Q: Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?*
*A: Because then it would be a foot!*

*Q: Why did the barber win the race?*
*A: Because he took a short cut!*

*Q: Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?*
*A: He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!*

*Q: Why did the tomato turn red?*
*A: It saw the salad dressing!*

*Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?*
*A: To get a root canal!*

*Q: Why don't you see giraffes in elementary school?*
*A: Because they're all in High School!*

*Q: Why was the maths book sad?*
*A: Because it had too many problems!*