i don't know if this thread is still relevant to discuss today in 2022. but i just wanna share my exp.

I'm Malay F and dating a Chinese guy for almost 3 years. he approaches me and he loves me more than I love him. He's gentle and generous. neve once we go out to eat I paid, he paid for all meal. he trusts me to keep his wallet and let me pay using his money. He bought me a bouquet of flowers every v-day, birthday which makes me like him even more. I date a Malay guy never receives such love before. they are not kedekut to spend to the one they love. but I don't like to feel in debt to all the money he spends. I usually will buy him an expensive give as my return and courtesy to him.  but that's not the issue here.

He's now late 30 and I am 27. both of us are busy working. I am not a person rushing to married, I have a career I want to chase. He is also busy with his work as he is the manager. but sometimes, I feel the loneliness despite having a bf because I wish I can marry him and live with him. i never ask or talk about marriage because we all know the barrier we had. but I also don't want to marry because i don't want to feel loneliness. I am afraid of loneliness after marriage more than the loneliness of being single/or in a dating relationship.

I am a Muslim who is not a modern-style woman. I still uphold onto my belief and faith in my religion. so such things like sleeping together, I want to avoid at all cost.

actually, before him, there is a married Chinese guy who in the midlle of 30 confessed to me that he liked me. I don't know why, but I am not a home-wrecker. I like to be friends with him coz he took good care of me. so I honestly tell him, he cannot like me, he's married, we can only befriend. we are still in contact with each other but not frequently. both of them have a similar characteristic which is gentle, and generous which I never had when I dated a Malay guy. they may sound silly, even when they help me kupas udang or put lauk on my plate already make my heart melt. such simple gesture can bring happiness to someone. 

what I want to say today to Malay girls out there, if you wish to date a Chinese guy, you can give it a try. it's not wrong to dream. but my advice don't put high hope you can be married to each other. but such a love experience in dating makes you feel appreciated and not put a lower standard in choosing a partner. Find someone who values you, but don't take advantage of their kindness. I also don't know who I will end up marry with, him or other guys. but I hope if it's not him, I still have a chance to date a good Chinese guy like them and further to marriage. I would love to have interracial marriage. because I want my life to be different from normal. but i know it's hard, but it can be possible.