QUOTE(GamerGal @ Jan 2 2018, 01:34 AM)
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I have a friend of mine, being friends for almost 7 years. We frequently hangout together and I know him since secondary school. So the thing is like this.
I told him that I got an offer for quite high salary and I thought he will be happy for me. But Since the day, he keep telling me how much he got in his bank and when he calls me, he will be in very bad mood and very lan c me too.
From that onwards, I try to talk to him nicely and even treat him to eat dinner to celebrate. But when I treated him dinner and the bill was only rm100+, he said ” so cheap, should eat more”. I know it's cheap but at least I got treat him to eat, unlike him didn't even treat me this amount before. And this sentence should not be said to your good friends, right?
From the day onwards, he sometimes called me and talk nicely but sometimes not. We didn't meet each other for 4 months since that day. This is the first time that we didn't hangout for quite long time. And when I called to ask, he will say “because you're busy”, bit he didn't even ask me to hangout, how the hell that he know im busy?
So I want to ask people here, is he jealous for what I have and should I continue be friends with him? He still will call me sometimes. Between, I am a girl and he's a guy.
As some of them said here, I agree it could be due to envy and that he's got some bias now since you're earning better than him. He may be struggling with money or work in his own way and this sudden news of you doing a lot better - put some impact on him.
It's simple, really. It's best not to avoid each other and confront him about the issue. One of these days over dinner or lunch when he starts jabbing at you again about money, stay calm and talk to him. Tell him you are uncomfortable with the way he is talking these days and whether he's facing any problem.
If he values your friendship, he will understand he's making things difficult for you. So if he still continues with his even after the confrontation, time you re-think the value of this so-called 'friendship'.
QUOTE(workaholic @ Jan 2 2018, 03:00 PM)
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Me poorfag I kinda know how it feels when the kaki that you been hanging out with suddenly upgraded their lifestyle.
A bit of my background I usually spend RM 5 - RM 6 a meal top when eating out at hawker stall & most of the case I don't order drink, more or less you can imagine what kind of buying power I'm having here.
Now a friend keep inviting me to dine at "high class" establishment that easily cost RM 30 onward for a simple meal + RM 10 for a drink and the cost added up for the whole outing for that day could cost upward to RM 100, which is about 20 days of my meal allowance, how does that sound like? And on top of that they also organizing cuti-cuti Malaysia, SEA which per trip could cost about RM 1,000.
Let's put yourself in my shoe if your allowance for a month is about RM 2,000, after deducting your own commitments there isn't much left, should I keep saying "YES" for all those invitations just so to maintain a "friendship"? Let's turn around say you got a Dato friend everyday invite you to dine with him that cost RM 1,000 a meal, even though he offer to pay for all your meals
la, but do you feel good having your friend keep paying for all your bills?
It's not that we feel bad on your high pay, just that we simply can't afford to catch up with your lifestyle.
Yes, it's difficult for you. Then perhaps you can just be honest and tell your friend you can't keep up with his lifestyle. Just kindly reject and say that it's nice of him to want to treat you, but you'll be more comfortable over meeting in Mamak and have a bite there. Give and take, is what should be between friends. Don't avoid your friend because of this issue, just be honest.