Sorry to hear about your accident, what level SCI are you? My best fren is also SCI C6/7. He's married recently, met his wife after the accident. I dont mean to sound crude or like an axxhole, but being forward and realistic, unless you're damn rich its not easy to find a girl whos willing to accept your condition esp in m'sia. Sorry again if I offend any girls in here but honestly ask yourself how many willing to accept the life long burden? have to take care of your husband whos in a wheelchair? I mean if it happen after you fall in love is a diffirent story, I've a few friends whom are life-long in wheelchair and thier wife are equally happy. But when you're free person and suddenly I ask you to get involve with a person in a chair is a totally different story. Will your parent accept the situation? most parents wants the best for thier kid...selfish as it may seem but thats the world we live in today.

OK back to your dillema, do you even realized that this COULD be the last girl whom will accept your condition and willing to go thru thick and thin with you? I can see she is really a very kind hearted person...if I'm in your shoes, I'll plunge right in. She is willing to sacrifice so much for you so why cant you give something back? Talk to your parents...tell them what else you gotta lose? You're already rock bottom so, you've nothing to fear...but everything to gain.

Just do it....

Pardon me if I sound heartless but being with a few friends whom are SCI, I more or less knows their daily struggle....

Hello, you think our fren is that dumb, just listen to my word and go meet this girl 1st time in his life in the nasional registra office ready to sign marriage certificate ka??? We cannot comment much coz we dont know...but base on only what lil information he wrote, do you think its easy to find an able bodied girl to commit into a rship with a wheelchair bound person? Unless he's damn rich than I see a motive...otherwise I think shes an angel...would you commit yourself to a wheelchair bound wife? ask yourself this question 1st.

2nd she is not being selfish about the religion issue...are you even living in Msia??? Here there is no choice...the gomen didnt give anyone (muslim) a choice, they cannot come out from the religion, so if they fall in love with a non-muslim its always the other party must sacrifice...unless you migrate elsewhere....

Comment meaning we only have so much information...not about can or cannot give our opinion.


Using him? you think she is using him? like how? what does she gain? and what does she stand to lose?


Religion that carries him this far or the doctor at the otopedic and the nurse and family support that carried him this far? Have you been involve with a wheelchair bound person? Involve in the sense of frens or family, have you ever taken care of any? Talk is easy...how many able body person can just migrate out from this country? not to mention a wheelchair bound person...get real my friend!

How many wheelchair bound fren you have? how many can get a gf not to mention wife? how many able bodied girl willing to date wheelchair ppl? Before you shoot like a hero, get real and reach out .... I have plenty of wheelchair friend and we always go TT...join us and get to know thier life

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Added on April 17, 2007, 4:25 pmTo be honest I know zip about OKU ppl, until it happen to my best fren ... after the accident in 03, he was in ICU for a week and after waking up it took over a year for him to accept that he may never walk again...he was a very active person, a cyclist, a camper, fisherman...we do all these very often.

He spend 9 months in the hospital...it took a lot of comfort and support from family and friends and not to mention all the kind hearted doctors and nurses in the hospital. He took 6 months b4 he learn how to use the wheel chair and getting in and out from the bed by himself...thanks to the guys at the physio department.

I was with him all the way...the hospital is like my second home....then slowly I join him with the Physio lesson...and got to know more SCI friends...

Sorry for the tread starter I dont mean to bring out all the bad memories, I'm sure you've experience the same...but I just want to enlighten some ppl who do not understand about life in a wheelchair. You think being alive is great? try falling off your wheelchair the first time in the bathroom and you cannot even help yourself!...so you talk about religion with me? I used to be a born again christian attending charasmatic every friday.... I guess your name applied nicely "YUPPIE", have you seen the uglier side of life????



This post has been edited by moorish: Apr 17 2007, 04:25 PM

Conroe, play by ears....one step at a time...but do remember this...not easy to get a girl committing to you....as you already know...even best fren eventually dissolve when you no longer can join them like last time.

Good luck to you and hope you have a happy ending.