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> Headache With Sister in Law family

intelredmi
post Dec 28 2017, 02:05 PM

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Today's update. My FIL just decided to withdraw ALL his life saving to help pay his son-in-law's ahlong debt. My wife, MIL, and other BIL all against it. He's already 66 and still working. Look like he's gonna work himself to death if this persists.
yeezai
post Dec 28 2017, 10:11 PM

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Intro some bank to him ..failed to pay loan will lead to bankruptcy...but money lend from relative or family members normally consider burn
ketupatlazat
post Dec 28 2017, 10:16 PM

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just wow

I guess we can't deny the father-son love
Odinn
post Dec 29 2017, 02:13 PM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Dec 27 2017, 11:10 AM)
It's been more than two months since my last post. I thought that everything gone better. But last night my wife received a call from her brother that the whole SIL family, her husband included had to stay at my FIL's house.The reason; when my SIL family came home yesterday, they saw some posters from ahlong sticked at their house, demanding debt repayment. According to her, if the debt is unpaid within one week, the interest is going to hike by 30 percent. My question is, can the ahlong do that? Is there any danger to their safety if they come back to stay at their own house?
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Ahlongs are unregulated, unlicensed individuals/institutions. So yes, they can very much do what they want, so long as it is within the law or as long as they can keep the law off their backs.

Since the debt will be paid off by your FIL, that is your cue to CUT TIES with that basket case. Did it once, quite certain it will be done again.
RobUlstan
post Dec 29 2017, 02:31 PM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Dec 28 2017, 02:05 PM)
Today's update. My FIL just decided to withdraw ALL his life saving to help pay his son-in-law's ahlong debt. My wife, MIL, and other BIL all against it. He's already 66 and still working. Look like he's gonna work himself to death if this persists.
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That's why Malay has the proverb 'Buat baik BERPADA-PADA, buat jahat jangan sekali'. Most people think this proverb is about the second verse when it is actually about the first.


Sedih
post Dec 29 2017, 09:53 PM

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Why SIL not divorce the parasite yet? I borrowed from. Ah long before and no problem at all. Because ah long also got their payment plan. Of course the interest is 50%,but if you are good paymaster, nothing is going to happen. Your biras pinjam and never pay that's why. Even with the dangerous ah long he didn't pay, apa lagi FIL and relatives' money.
Jliew168
post Jan 1 2018, 01:37 AM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Dec 28 2017, 02:05 PM)
Today's update. My FIL just decided to withdraw ALL his life saving to help pay his son-in-law's ahlong debt. My wife, MIL, and other BIL all against it. He's already 66 and still working. Look like he's gonna work himself to death if this persists.
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Better don't, once ah long know your FIL will pay they will continues harass your FIL.. Never ending stories

Your brother in law still have house, ask him sell the house n settle with ah long.. Can call someone to negotiate interest if really wanna pay etc Michael chong

This kind of people never change, since not the first time definitely not last time..
intelredmi
post Jan 2 2018, 08:13 AM

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New Year's update. A few days back my FIL called said that he want to make agreement with that son-in-law of his. In the agreement, he said, he's willing to lend some money, but he have to pay within one month. If fails, the cafe ownership will be transferred to my FIL. Yesterday my FIL said something about my biras being "worse than the devil himself". We found out that the biras dont want any agreement, but my FIL give the money anyway because he's worried about family's safety. We also found out that my biras stole money from his own wife occasionally and made my SIL his guarantor while borrowing money from ahlong, and put my FIL's address, without her knowledge. I never saw my FIL that angry before. It is also found out that my biras is a hardcore defaulter. He default his personal loan from banks, his credit card debt, and never paid back his PTPTN.

My eldest SIL has to stay with them for the time being concerning her sister's and her children's safety because my biras is acting being aggressive towards his wife and children this few days. I also dont understand why the wife still want to live with him. She's beaten physically, her money taken without her knowledge, being cheated before with a younger woman, but still dont want divorce.

This post has been edited by intelredmi: Jan 2 2018, 08:22 AM
Odinn
post Jan 2 2018, 09:15 AM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Jan 2 2018, 08:13 AM)
New Year's update. A few days back my FIL called said that he want to make agreement with that son-in-law of his. In the agreement, he said, he's willing to lend some money, but he have to pay within one month. If fails, the cafe ownership will be transferred to my FIL. Yesterday my FIL said something about my biras being "worse than the devil himself". We found out that the biras dont want any agreement, but my FIL give the money anyway because he's worried about family's safety. We also found out that my biras stole money from his own wife occasionally and made my SIL his guarantor while borrowing money from ahlong, and put my FIL's address, without her knowledge. I never saw my FIL that angry before. It is also found out that my biras is a hardcore defaulter. He default his personal loan from banks, his credit card debt, and never paid back his PTPTN.

My eldest SIL has to stay with them for the time being concerning her sister's and her children's safety because my biras is acting being aggressive towards his wife and children this few days. I also dont understand why the wife still want to live with him. She's beaten physically, her money taken without her knowledge, being cheated before with a younger woman, but still dont want divorce.
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There is no recourse to his actions. Only thing you can do is protect your own family. If your wife wants to get involved in the sister's affairs, then just take care of your SIL and her kids and distance yourselves from the manchild. Create as big a distance as you all possibly can from him. The more it appears you can help him, the longer he will leech off you. Make that distance, otherwise the ahlongs will next harass you lot.
quikstep
post Jan 2 2018, 03:42 PM

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lodge police report for protection. as long as guarantor did not sign any documents, then not liable. if they did, then too bad.
danielmckey
post Jan 2 2018, 03:49 PM

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Why you need to suffer other people problem?
darx84
post Jan 3 2018, 07:47 AM

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Wow! But it is non of your business. Ur BIL, SIL and FIL all stubborn, so there is nth much u can really do. But for sure ur BIL will borrow from ah long again, and ur FIL will have to sell land sell house next.
intelredmi
post Jan 3 2018, 08:07 AM

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It IS my business. As I lost my parents when I was little, and dont have any siblings, my FIL is like my own father to me. If he somehow lost ALL his savings to his piece of shit son in law, he will have to depend to his children, most probably my wife, and that will involve me as well.

This post has been edited by intelredmi: Jan 3 2018, 08:08 AM
sweet_pez
post Jan 3 2018, 09:44 AM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Jan 2 2018, 08:13 AM)
New Year's update. A few days back my FIL called said that he want to make agreement with that son-in-law of his. In the agreement, he said, he's willing to lend some money, but he have to pay within one month. If fails, the cafe ownership will be transferred to my FIL. Yesterday my FIL said something about my biras being "worse than the devil himself". We found out that the biras dont want any agreement, but my FIL give the money anyway because he's worried about family's safety. We also found out that my biras stole money from his own wife occasionally and made my SIL his guarantor while borrowing money from ahlong, and put my FIL's address, without her knowledge. I never saw my FIL that angry before. It is also found out that my biras is a hardcore defaulter. He default his personal loan from banks, his credit card debt, and never paid back his PTPTN.

My eldest SIL has to stay with them for the time being concerning her sister's and her children's safety because my biras is acting being aggressive towards his wife and children this few days. I also dont understand why the wife still want to live with him. She's beaten physically, her money taken without her knowledge, being cheated before with a younger woman, but still dont want divorce.
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This is a dude who will never stand on his own feet. From the history of it, he's not going to stop what he's doing until ah long comes and take a limb or two. He believes your father in law will continue to help him, so he's relying on the poor man. Best to get yr BIL to declare bankrupt since he can't afford to pay his debts. With this, he can no longer start up any business under his own name nor borrow any money.

Make sure you guys spread the word even to ahlong that none of you will bear his debt so better not lend him any. So when there's no willing lender, he will have no source of money. I really pity the sister in law. I believe she sticks to him for several reasons - mainly for the children but I'm sure she really loves him and couldn't bear to see him become worse than he is now (which will happen if she leaves).

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