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> Headache With Sister in Law family

taitianhin
post Sep 12 2017, 05:27 PM

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Just think that,
everybody for themselves...
Newsray
post Sep 12 2017, 09:01 PM

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It is very dangerous if he borrow from ah long. He will drag everyone down with him.

Secure all your house bills and IC. Who knows he got a copy as guarantor. Stay away cuz ah long will try threat nearby family and relatives. Once kena, you need a taiko in your area to tell the ah long you tarak kenal this person. Anyhow kene pay duit kopi.

Stay away. If need help never borrow them more than 1 month of salary. Money not easy to save nowadays.
intelredmi
post Sep 13 2017, 07:57 AM

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QUOTE(loui @ Sep 12 2017, 05:03 PM)
seriously, kasi divorce saja

ppl like that will never learn

their attitude has adverse effect to anyone around them especially the small kids

plus be firm with your wife, tell her not to lend SIL any more money
*
Yeah, I scolded my wife kaw2 yesterday for lending money to her sister. BTW my SIL did intended to report to Pejabat Agama when he beat her a few years back, accompanied by my wife. But midway she changed her mind and gave the hubby second chance. They got their fourth child after that. Till today my SIL mati2 dun wan to file for divorce, thinking of the children

This post has been edited by intelredmi: Sep 13 2017, 07:58 AM
intelredmi
post Sep 13 2017, 08:02 AM

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QUOTE(taitianhin @ Sep 12 2017, 05:27 PM)
Just think that,
everybody for themselves...
*
For me, I never or intend to give even one cent to him. Let him die, the earlier the better. Bodoh sombong, menyusahkan orang. Too ego to work, but tak malu ask his wife to beg from her family. He himself dont dare to tunjuk muka to us.

But my wife and her father so soft hearted, mainly because they pity my SIL and her children. But I know in the end the money always end up with the stupid husband of hers.

xecton
post Sep 13 2017, 09:38 AM

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buy his land for cheap the next time he wants money
intelredmi
post Sep 13 2017, 09:47 AM

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QUOTE(xecton @ Sep 13 2017, 09:38 AM)
buy his land for cheap the next time he wants money
*
I wish I can. I'm not a rich guy with hundreds of thousands lying around.

During my earlier marriage, family always compare me to him. He is University graduate but I'm just secondary school leaver. He inherited a few pieces of lands worth hundreds of thousands while I'm just an orphan who inherited only just a bit more than a thousand ringgit from my poor father. When he open his first shop, family members look up to him while I'm just a support staff with basic salary just RM1000++ that time.
Kim Bi Jan
post Sep 13 2017, 10:11 AM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Sep 12 2017, 03:21 PM)
Let me share about my sister in law and her family. She's a senior executive at a GLC, making at least 6K monthly, maybe more. 4 children age between 2 to 10. Her husband on the other hand refuse to work for other. Both are tertiary educated. For me, if its only her and her kids, 6k++ is more than enough.

The problem is the husband. He inherited a few pieces of lands from his dad, and sell them off. Made a few hundred thousands. He use the it to open a small health and beauty product shop but failed miserably. Closed shop,  have to borrow here and there (from the wifes parents, and her siblings, my wife included).

Then he sold another piece of his inherited land, and open a cafe. Also not going really well. A few times his wife come to us and her parents to borrow money as he is unable to pay the workers and the shop rent. My wife lend her sister some money without telling me, and I got really angry when I found out this morning. The husband mati2 dont want to find job, or even drive uber or grab. Always want to be the boss even have to beg from us. His own siblings dont even care to help him at all. FYI his wife's salary alone is more than me and my wife's combined income.

I pity my 66 years old father in law have to keep working, because he's worried about his daughter and grandkids. Even have to dig their savings to help the daughter. What you will do if you re in my sister in laws husband position? Will you look for a job? Drive uber/grab? Close shop and try other business? Or just bertahan with the losing cafe business?

Sorry for bad English. Not an English speaker
*
still need to help, coz its blood.

but maybe you can draw a line after certain amount.

not sure what's the amount now, but base on your own comfort...maybe like your max limit is RM50k. but discuss this with your wife..u can lower or increase pending on your financial status.

everytime they come and ask..then jst borrow a little here and there.

once it hits the limit, rm50k example, then tell them you dont have anymore left in your saving..ccoz all already borrow to them.

they will understand eventually...but important is ur wife NEED to be siding with you on this.

If ur wife think the limit is rm30k or even rm100k, so long u ppl can affort, then go for it. its ur wife's sibling..so ur wife need to agree. this is important..else u ppl gonna have arguement now and then when this issue rises nod.gif
intelredmi
post Sep 13 2017, 10:15 AM

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QUOTE(Kim Bi Jan @ Sep 13 2017, 10:11 AM)
still need to help, coz its blood.

but maybe you can draw a line after certain amount.

not sure what's the amount now, but base on your own comfort...maybe like your max limit is RM50k. but discuss this with your wife..u can lower or increase pending on your financial status.

everytime they come and ask..then jst borrow a little here and there.

once it hits the limit, rm50k example, then tell them you dont have anymore left in your saving..ccoz all already borrow to them.

they will understand eventually...but important is ur wife NEED to be siding with you on this.

If ur wife think the limit is rm30k or even rm100k, so long u ppl can affort, then go for it. its ur wife's sibling..so ur wife need to agree. this is important..else u ppl gonna have arguement now and then when this issue rises nod.gif
*
I don't even have 10k in cash cry.gif

As I said earlier I'm not even rich, not even in middle income group. Higher low income group maybe. With his family background, inheritance and education he should make better in life than me. I'm the poorer person here. But its the other way around.

This post has been edited by intelredmi: Sep 13 2017, 10:19 AM
Kim Bi Jan
post Sep 13 2017, 10:24 AM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Sep 13 2017, 10:15 AM)
I don't even have 10k in cash cry.gif

As I said earlier I'm not even rich, not even in middle income group. Higher low income group maybe. With his family background, inheritance and education he should make better in life than me. I'm the poorer person here. But its the other way around.
*
okok. my guideline is jst an example.

then dont put ur limit as rm10k..discuss with ur wife, she knows the financial status u ppl are in. so she should be able to calculate and put an estimate limit you ppl can support.

it can be rm5k or rm7k..doesnt matter..important is that is ur financial limit.

ur wife will definitely help if possible..so discuss with her on the limit at least u ppl know where u all will stand after borrowing them.

else if there's no such line drawn, and ur wife kept borrowing as and when needed..eventually the money borrow will be more than u ppl can afford.

so discuss with her tonight ba..this shit happens in life.

important u have a plan to gauge how it will impact ur life..so u wont be left dumb-founded when suddenly, the saving u ppl have for emergency disappeared during you and your wife's OWN RAINY days. nod.gif
adamhzm90
post Sep 13 2017, 10:36 AM

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this type will never learn when always got people always helping them..


Imp Bron
post Sep 13 2017, 12:49 PM

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2017 is not a good year for business
all SME died one after another

The bad economic situation makes people keep their money and spending less indirectly kill the SMEs.
mssv19
post Sep 13 2017, 12:55 PM

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Divorce.......next time as parent must detect this kind of useless son in law or daughter in law......don't approve their marriage in the first place... watch tv, read news have this kind a lot.....
Virlution
post Sep 13 2017, 01:24 PM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Sep 12 2017, 04:22 PM)
Just need view from anybody here who did business, or have any knowledge on business, or anything related.

He inherited land from his dad, sell it off for a few hundred thousands (he said) and open small cafe business. That means he didn't have to borrow right? Then how come the business not doing well a few months, suddenly his debt amounted to more than 30K? Something is fishy right? Any possibilities? Sorry again I'm just secondary school educated, never did any major business, and just working as support staff, really need other experienced people's view.
*
money few hundred k spent to open business, reno, but furniture, fixings, goods & material... all gone.

Need money to pay rent and salary come from daily sales... no sales within few month can suddenly accumulate up to a big amount.
taitianhin
post Sep 13 2017, 01:54 PM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Sep 13 2017, 08:02 AM)
For me, I never or intend to give even one cent to him. Let him die, the earlier the better. Bodoh sombong, menyusahkan orang. Too ego to work, but tak malu ask his wife to beg from her family. He himself dont dare to tunjuk muka to us.

But my wife and her father so soft hearted, mainly because they pity my SIL and her children. But I know in the end the money always end up with the stupid husband of hers.
*
- Temporary... get the custody of the money.
- Until u approved...it will not go to them...
- Get him to sign a loan contract....
- He sure say you dont trust me is it.
So tell him,
- If he questions and he neglect to sign...mean he dont trust you
- you are not going to do anything on the contrat if it meet requirement
- is a unsecure loan that you are signing. ..money out...money in...Date and time...
- becoz of relative only you loan out..., else bank dont giv a shit
- tell him find other source if he dont trust you, and dont sign

And
- get them to get % of the business too...
- nt just blindly loan out
- Sign Contract legally

This post has been edited by taitianhin: Sep 13 2017, 01:57 PM
ketahian
post Sep 13 2017, 02:01 PM

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This kind of man sure tak solat. Thats why tuhan marah
seikoho1
post Sep 13 2017, 03:00 PM

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reality strikes
Pete the great
post Sep 13 2017, 07:07 PM

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QUOTE(intelredmi @ Sep 13 2017, 08:02 AM)
For me, I never or intend to give even one cent to him. Let him die, the earlier the better. Bodoh sombong, menyusahkan orang. Too ego to work, but tak malu ask his wife to beg from her family. He himself dont dare to tunjuk muka to us.

But my wife and her father so soft hearted, mainly because they pity my SIL and her children. But I know in the end the money always end up with the stupid husband of hers.
*
Seriously cannot brain the husband so useless Andy affair outside n she still want more children?

4 kids with this type of worthless fella. Poor kids tak berdosa come into this world. Soon your SIL will exp financial problems at the rate he plunder.
Pete the great
post Sep 13 2017, 07:08 PM

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QUOTE(mssv19 @ Sep 13 2017, 12:55 PM)
Divorce.......next time as parent must detect this kind of useless son in law or daughter in law......don't approve their marriage in the first place... watch tv, read news have this kind a lot.....
*
Yes now ts sil hv 5 kids to feed. Get rid of the husband then only 4.
TreyLey
post Sep 13 2017, 07:10 PM

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If she's your in law then her husband is your brother?
psyduck89
post Sep 13 2017, 07:12 PM

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ops..

din know its serious /k

This post has been edited by psyduck89: Sep 13 2017, 07:12 PM

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