Thank you everyone for your comment and input.
No, I am no longer in IT from the technical point of view.Yes, i do know that IT is has lots of opportunities in the market.
Sadly, it is not a life i want, the stress, and the frustration. Ppl dont treat u like a human, they treat u like a tool and expect u to come out with everything with a flick of a button.
And I was tired with the "fire fighting" of the system in the middle of the night.
Enough of that, I am in project management now. Though, most of the time, I am doing admin job, and with the situation of the department now. I foresee it will be closed down and i will be transfer to some other department
And I do not learn much other than critical thinking on how to solve problem and provide suggestion to my project manager.
I am not specialize in anything at the current situation.
I want to change my career (again), I want to be more focus in a few aspects of an industry and I am fond with strategy/marketing planning and business improvement, this is something i found out during a portion of my project handling within these 2 years.
Sadly, keep seeking, yet there is no such role for me (either senior position is open, or i do not have the qualification).
I am not into sales, because i am a quiet person, and prefer to think of a design and strategy.
From what i said above, I seem fine...just that, do i want to continue like this? Just assist in scheduling meeting and minutes writing etc kind of admin job? I seriously do not want, I do not want my life to end like this.
As reaching 30...the time for trial and error is really minimal, and my father has retire from his job...whole family depends on me soon after his EPF has finished. I keep applying for job...yet none call me...
If you ask me what am I good at while the others can't, sadly, what I am doing now is very general, but the thing is, I managed to change myself to management line with the introduction and chance given by other,
and learn about excel and word better than those studied in finance. So, the employer who gave me the comment that "i do not know anything other than IT" is totally invalid.
Sadly, job is hard to find now...apply for job is easy, but to get a chance to interview is hard...just the feeling of lost and frustration.
What am i seeking now? I seriously do not know, i can keep trying to apply and hope for the best...but as i am getting older...I do not want everyone dear to me to leave me just because i stay where i am now and no opportunity for me to prove myself...
I just unable to see my value in my career life or life as a whole...feel very frustrated at how i am now...not sure what next step to take...freaking want to punch myself...
Lost in my career path, Sigh