sick still can post jokes ah?

^ ERROR 404: JOKE NOT FOUND

^ headache excuse phailed

He is smart


A young wife, who was becoming frustrated with her young husbands constant
Demands for sex, decides to make a schedule for him, to cut down on the
Amount of times that they will have to make love for the rest of their
Marriage.

While getting ready for work, she writes on a piece of paper, "Honey, you
Know I love you, but your never ending requests for sex are leaving me
Drained and really tired. So I propose that we only have sex on days that
Start with the letter 'T', to minimize the frequency of our lovemaking
Sessions. Don't be mad at me honey, just understand where I am coming from,
And let me know if my request is too demanding of you."

On her way out the door, she uses a refrigerator magnet and sticks the note
To the fridge door, hoping that her sex craved husband will be
Understanding and accepting of her proposal when he reads it.

Upon returning home, she glances at the refrigerator and notices that her
Note has been replaced with a note from her husband that reads, "Baby, I
Didn't realize that I was putting you under so much pressure and I'm
Sorry.

I accept your proposal and have even taken the extra step of listing at the
Bottom of this letter, those days starting with the letter 'T' to make
Sure that we are on the same page.

1. TUESDAY

2. THURSDAY

3. TODAY

4. TOMORROW

P.S. I love you too, and remember it's still TODAY, I am waiting for you
Upstairs."

Spaghetti

For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One
night, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin
his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she
would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to
raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child
turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was
born. To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card,
and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for the child
support payments to begin.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
"Honey," she said, "you received a very strange post card today." "Oh,
just give it to me and I'll explain it later," he said. The wife obeyed
and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti,
Spaghetti. Three with meatballs, two without. Send extra sauce."

THE WIFE'S NIGHT OUT

Wife decided to go out with her friends drinking and dancing.....
Husband okay with it, because he get to watch sports all night.

Husband hear wife stumble into bed around 4am and he laugh,
knowing that she's is going to have a massive hangover tomorrow.

Husband woke up early next morning while wife still fast asleep
and he goes to check on the family Volvo which she used last night
and he sign in relief as it's was all in one piece, same as before.He
then circle the car looking for dents and find none. But..........Wait
a minute.....W.T.F is that ?

See image attached.

---

Added on August 31, 2007, 6:39 pm
WARNING: 18SX jokes



This post has been edited by kamwah: Aug 31 2007, 06:41 PM

Men:

1. All men are extremely busy.
2. Although they are so busy, they still have time for women.
3. Although they have time for women, they don't really care for them.
4. Although they don't really care for them, they always have one around.
5. Although they always have one around them, they always try their luck with others.
6. Although they try their luck with others, they get really pissed off if the woman leaves them..
7. Although the woman leaves them they still don't learn from their mistakes and still try their luck with others!


Women:

1. The most important thing for a woman is financial security.
2. Although this is so important, they still go out and buy expensive clothes and stuff.
3. Although they always buy expensive clothes, they will still say that they never have something to wear!
4. Although they never have something to wear, they always dress beautifully.
5. Although they always dress beautifully, you hardly care.
6. Although you hardly care, they still expect you to compliment them.
7. Although they expect you to compliment them, when you do, they don't believe you!

---

Added on September 25, 2007, 12:12 pmWife: " Sir, I would like to call on my husband who left me and brought all our five kids wth him."

Radio Host: " Ok, go ahead!"

Wife: " Sweetheart, please return back all the kids, actually only one of them is yours."

---

Added on September 25, 2007, 12:13 pmWIFE: It's a miracle! You came home early.
HUSBAND: I just obeyed what my boss told me to do. He said: "GO TO HELL", that's why I came home early

---

Added on September 25, 2007, 12:14 pm1st night grandma wore a see-thru dress, grandpa didn't react...
2nd night grandma wore t-back, grandpa still didn't react...
3rd night grandma all naked, grandpa said "what is that you are wearing, it's all crumpled!!"

---

Added on September 25, 2007, 12:14 pmJohn: it's my wife's birthday
Peter: what's your gift to her?
John: i asked her what she wanted
Peter: what did she said?
John: anything, as long as there is a DIAMOND.
Peter: what did you gave her?
John: playing cards

This post has been edited by kamwah: Sep 25 2007, 12:14 PM

boobies lady pwned

^ seems repost somewhere

anyway just laugh loh

***** = pu$$y
LYN will auto-censor vulgar words

not (*)(*) meh?

familiar?

should be more or less like sinusoidal graph?

eat 1st fark 1st

A female DJ on the radio asked listeners on her radio program to
call to answer trivia questions. The first caller to give the correct
answer would get a prize from the sponsor.

She asked: "Can anyone out there tell me the household name of
SodiumChloride"

A caller who is a housewife called up eager to answer the question. Not
knowing the answer to the question, she asked for a clue.
"Something you put on your husbands eggs in the morning." she said.

The lady confidently said : "Talcum powder".

also this: