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Yveatel
post Sep 18 2022, 02:28 PM

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I am sorry to see this. Honestly, while I am having fun with my family, sex really goes down hills. My wife never touch me if I initiate. Even I did initiate, she hardly responds. Perhaps too tired with two kids now. But I did taking care of the kids and send the kids to bed. In the end, it is always men's fault for looking for other relieve method.
steevan1000
post Sep 19 2022, 07:21 PM

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i've divorced & separated with wife over 5 years
didnt get into any new relationship ever since
sexual needs, i just "Mr DIY"
didnt spend money on this part too
B0ss_ku
post Oct 7 2022, 07:37 PM

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QUOTE(hydroboy87 @ Sep 9 2022, 04:51 PM)
I am more than happy to hear from women, especially wives who have experienced something similar. I get you and I agree. As I have mentioned, I have tried all of the above. We have not gone on a date in like 4 years. I have tried all kinds of things. The most we have done is lunch during workdays. Which is not romantic at all...And we are unable to leave our son anywhere as we do not have any support system. Both of our parents/inlaws are not in KL/Sel - so it has been the both of us all these while. No one to jaga our son over night. It is such a painful situation.

I have also lost count of the times I have spoken to her. The latest was like two weeks ago. I am with the hope she'd initiate something. Two weeks - nothing. And I have been quite silent and sulking. Still, she is like not bothered or just avoiding.

I am very sure , many men are going through this.
I agree, and I have been doing a lot of reading on this topic lately. The most common explanation is hormonal issue and the changes a woman goes through. But what I cannot accept is that, I am being a good husband (again not expecting brownie points here), and I have expressed many times to her that she is very attractive and I yearn for her. Recently I even suggested, let's get an air bnb during the day since baby sitter can only cover during the day time, get a nice place. Spend the day the there, and let me take some sexy photos of you. My intention is to make her feel sexy again... but again, no reaction.
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Here's a suggestion...make yourself looks sexy instead, go to gym, build a six pack, get groom, and wear shorts around home to arouse her
B0ss_ku
post Oct 7 2022, 07:43 PM

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QUOTE(ah_suknat @ Nov 24 2021, 08:04 AM)
Hi guys

Been married since feb 2019, we(well me actually) finally decided to want to have kids of our own.
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Replying to my own old account...cant retrieve back...

Now we are expecting our first boy...22 weeks now
NightFelix
post Oct 11 2022, 04:58 PM

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QUOTE(B0ss_ku @ Oct 7 2022, 07:43 PM)
Replying to my own old account...cant retrieve back...

Now we are expecting our first boy...22 weeks now
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Congrats! It gonna be sleepless night awaiting you!
nihility
post Oct 12 2022, 12:15 PM

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QUOTE(hydroboy87 @ Sep 9 2022, 10:52 AM)
It is me again guys. I previously shared the challenges I was going through with my wife. And sadly, things are not much different this year. Personally I have ramped up my responsibilities in making sure I help out more with house work. However, sex is life is still non-existent. And to make it worse, she doesn't even touch me sexually, and there's absolutely no intimacy whatsoever. We do not have and deep conversations anymore. We are not going out. Nothing. No dirty talk, no jokes

And each time I ask her, she just has a defensive wall, citing tiredness, busy with work. I mean, who is not busy with work. And I do not intend to compare our workloads. Anyway, she does not initiate anything. I am actually very frustrated with all these, and I am not sure what else to. I have slowly began to understand what some men end up violating the marriage rule. We signed up for monogamy. But not for celibacy.

Our son is older now, and it is easier to manage him on our own. Although we are still sending him to the baby-sitter on the weekdays. Despite all these, she still has no mood for any husband and wife time. Next year, we will be sending our son to nursery. I can already forsee the other excuses that may come.

What should I do? Go to therapy and waste money? By the way, we're in our mid 30s, and our issues began right after having our son - only child, and wife does not want another one sad.gif 

We've been together since we were teenagers. I can also confirm there's no adultery involved as both of us are working from home and hardly go out.

I really feel like I am going through some kinda of mental torture at the moment. There have been nights were I have cried to bed thinking about this. Like, why do I deserve this? It gets very lonely considering that she is the one person I love with all my heart. But deeply inside, I know I cannot live like this. I am getting older, and I do not wish to waste my life by not receiving any love from my spouse.  And the thought of separating is too painful because I do not wish to go through hell, and put my son through hell. He is too young, and innocent.

Any other dads out there who have been through this before? I will really appreciate if you guys could advise me. It's so lonely and I don't know who to talk to. I did try asking some female colleagues previously, without shedding much detail, and they just shoved it aside. Of course, siding a fellow woman. I am not sure if men even talk about this openly.

rclxub.gif  bangwall.gif  cry.gif
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The bolded part could be root the cause. How open is she to talk about it or she just sweep it under the carpet / avoid the discussion ?

I faced the same life resistance during my mid 30s as well. I talked about it with my wife, it is the psychology fear of unplanned pregnancy - condom or morning after pill is out of tolerance. That time, we no longer want any more kids. I made a decisive decision, if that fear is the cause of the life resistance, I'll remove the cause of the fear. I took 2 days off, went for the vasectomy at KPJ, the frequency of intimacy are coming back, in fact it is better now. My wife seems to enjoy the sex now without the fear of pregnancy.

That is for my case but not all case is the same. If it is not this issue but other issue, don't go for vasectomy blindly.

*Also, don't talk about the marriage issue with the female colleagues, you will invite unnecessary "tribulation" to your marriage.

This post has been edited by nihility: Oct 12 2022, 03:47 PM
OlgaC4
post Oct 13 2022, 10:14 AM

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QUOTE(NightFelix @ Oct 11 2022, 04:58 PM)
Congrats! It gonna be sleepless night awaiting you!
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So negative. Enjoy them they grow up very fast. take a lot of picture and video.
Ethan_Rob
post Oct 15 2022, 08:50 AM

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I love taking pictures of kids.
shinn911
post Oct 28 2022, 09:20 PM

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been reading and getting good info from you guys....expecting my first....10 weeks d

but my wife been looking into confinement centers and they all kasi marketing talk etc etc.....must book this month ada promo 2k / 3k etc etc

i think i can wait out until 1-2 months before deciding which center is good.....what do you guys think??


NightFelix
post Nov 2 2022, 10:22 AM

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QUOTE(shinn911 @ Oct 28 2022, 09:20 PM)
been reading and getting good info from you guys....expecting my first....10 weeks d

but my wife been looking into confinement centers and they all kasi marketing talk etc etc.....must book this month ada promo 2k / 3k etc etc

i think i can wait out until 1-2 months before deciding which center is good.....what do you guys think??
*
if book first can get full refund within certain of period then why not just to get the discount but....

u have to take consideration that the center also could be full, so when u really decide to go, maybe they no more slot for you also.

D10yrspain
post Nov 8 2022, 06:25 PM

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QUOTE(hydroboy87 @ Sep 9 2022, 11:17 AM)
Haihz....It kinda pisses me off that women can just sweep this under the carpet. And when things go south, blame the men.

Thank you brother. I will check out Opt 1 for now. I am not gonna lie, Opt 2 has crept up into my head many, many times but I am quite reluctant. But I am not looking to pay to 'release' which is of course the easiest option. I just want love and care. Also, I am not I judging anyone. I perfectly understand why many man go for Opt 2.
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If you opt for affair please be honest and tell her beforehand.
At least there's a time frame to let her think about what's wrong between you 2. Since she can't communicate with you, giving her the time to think about your request.

Not all perempuan the same. It also has alot to do with:

1) Do you only care to satisfy yourself on the bed rather than her 99% of the time?
2) Do u ever had a fling outside long ago before this and you rejected your wife needs on bed 99% of the time?
3) The hormone can be fix but it also has to do with daily dietary, fast food .....etc

This post has been edited by D10yrspain: Nov 9 2022, 09:19 AM
ericjoe
post Nov 21 2022, 04:42 AM

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I need advise to be a father. I want to have PIV with my wife but my p*nis does not get hard enough when she is very simulated. Which forum can I use in lowyat to discuss more?
steevan1000
post Nov 21 2022, 10:48 AM

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QUOTE(ericjoe @ Nov 21 2022, 04:42 AM)
I need advise to be a father. I want to have PIV with my wife but my p*nis does not get hard enough when she is very simulated. Which forum can I use in lowyat to discuss more?
*
on health perspective, there's possibility you may have high blood pressure or blood circulation related illness as such health problems can cause decrease efficiency of your banana

on other hand, maybe you're very stressful during the happy session with your wife, try to think of some ways to release some stress first the day before

This post has been edited by steevan1000: Nov 21 2022, 10:48 AM
Yveatel
post Nov 21 2022, 12:20 PM

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QUOTE(ericjoe @ Nov 21 2022, 04:42 AM)
I need advise to be a father. I want to have PIV with my wife but my p*nis does not get hard enough when she is very simulated. Which forum can I use in lowyat to discuss more?
*
Do you check with doctor? is it medical issue?

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