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 About Cover Letter for job application., Fresh Graduate seeking for help

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SUSLuke Bryan
post Aug 1 2015, 02:57 PM, updated 9y ago

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From: Selangor, Malaysia



Hi guys, I'm a fresh graduate guy. Can you guys help me improve my cover letter? I'm still unsure whether my cover letter is good or not. smile.gif
I have a few questions that I want to ask.

1) If the website just provide the HR email only, how do i address the person? Should i write Dear Sir/Madam or Dear Hiring Manager?
2) What do you think about my explanation for my skills in this cover letter? Is it good enough?
3) Do i need to attach the cover letter? Or just write the cover letter in our Email body?
4) My cover letter format is true or wrong?


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This post has been edited by Luke Bryan: Aug 1 2015, 03:02 PM
ChaChaZero
post Aug 1 2015, 07:50 PM

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Joined: Sep 2006
QUOTE(Luke Bryan @ Aug 1 2015, 02:57 PM)
Hi guys, I'm a fresh graduate guy.  Can you guys help me improve my cover letter? I'm still unsure whether my cover letter is good or not. smile.gif
I have a few questions that I want to ask.

1) If the website just provide the HR email only, how do i address the person? Should i write Dear Sir/Madam or Dear Hiring Manager?
2) What do you think about my explanation for my skills in this cover letter? Is it good enough?
3) Do i need to attach the cover letter? Or just write the cover letter in our Email body?
4) My cover letter format is true or wrong?
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*
Hi Luke,

1. You can just address it to "Dear Sir/Madam" if you do not know the person who will be going through your cover letter/resume.

2. The explanation looks good but I have to comment on the 3rd paragraph where you mentioned that you're different than a normal student. I feel that it is not necessary to downplay other potential candidates to make yourself look good. Your sentence here generalizes that all you're the only student who was active in etc etc which I can guarantee you is not true. If it were me, I would scrap that whole paragraph and put the sentence starting from "I was a committee of quality etc etc to the 4th paragraph.

Words like motivated, proactive, dynamic etc isn't very well suited in a cover letter. My reasoning is that all you're doing here is spewing out words to glorify yourself. What you need to do is not say, but show what you have. I think your fourth paragraph is a very good example of you showing your experience.

3. This really depends on whether there were any instructions left on the page where you got the info to send the cover/resume to. Some, more formal companies prefer it as a separate attachment due to the weird formatting that happens on various email clients, for example from gmail > MS Outlook > Lotus Notes. I would advise that you attach the cover letter. In the email body, state what the purpose of your email is such as where you got the contact from, the reason for the email and a short description of the attachments that you are including in the email.

4. Format is correct. I've never seen any cover letter format that isn't like yours.
cant think of a username
post Aug 1 2015, 09:47 PM

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cover letter? for malaysian employers? my experience tells me you might be wasting your time taking it too seriously.

but i'll help a lil without changing it too much... sorry malas nak spacing

QUOTE
Referring to your advertisement in J*bstr**t, I am interested in joining your company as a/an <insert job title>. I have been seeking to secure a challenging and exciting position in your organisation where I will have the opportunity to progress and develop my skills.  I am currently in my final year pursuing a Bachelor of Information Science (Hons) in Resource Center Management from xxxxxx and will graduate in May 2016. I am a self-motivated, proactive and dynamic individual that is very keen to learn and acquire new skills and knowledge. I actively participated in extra co-curricular activities while pursuing my degree. Some highlights in my participation are when I was a Committee of Quality and 5S for xxx College Representative Committee and Facilitator for University Orientation Week. My active involvement in many program has prepared me well, nurturing my interpersonal and communication skills which are essential in the working environment. Despite not having any working experience <never say this, sorry for being rude, but f*ck its very likely a kid can do your job.. so please don't... and yeah don't copy paste this>, I have gone through a five month industrial training where I was given tasks equivalent to a management executive. I performed well during the training which exposed me to various management skills and practical knowledge. I feel that my abilities would provide a positive influence within your organisation and I would welcome the opportunity to discuss my interest further. I have attached my resume with this letter and can be contacted by telephone: xxx or email: xxxxxx@gmail.com. Thank you for your interest and consideration.


ok malas dah whistling.gif

 

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