Hey guys... Anyone experienced starting a relationship itself on an LDR basis?

Meet physical at first or meet online at first?

We meet up physical first then started LDR. Now married

Meet physical at first lo.... I'm trying to rechase the same girl again, due to personal circumstances last time (~12 wars back), i didn't make my first move... And yeah, recently, we clicked again, and i think it is going quite well conversationally... Just that she is posted to east Malaysia for a few years....

just see her as a friend. thats up to you whether you want to have sex or not

Oh. Then similar case (except meeting 12 years ago part). me west she east

Yes. We tied the knot and now me west she still east. LDR as usual

Does internet love still exist? Can LDR grow this way?

a lot of trusts. Both parties ideally should have less than few sex partners in their life.

I personally went through tough LDR and I would say it hardly worked out.. regardless how much commitments being put by both party, I still consider it a retarded relationship somehow, close to delusional at times.

not sure if mine counts...couple with my then gf for one month, then straight LDR for a couple of years, since I live oversea and she's still studying in MY. LDR 4+ years, married also LDR until I managed to get her visa (visa was suspended during covid time)


internet is a tool to communicate? FaceTime my SO most of the time during our LDR, way better than our parents days of waiting for letters

long distance relationships sucked

https://youtube.com/shorts/N-iiBJ8b9MU?feature=share

This post has been edited by -mystery-: May 23 2022, 11:55 PM

LDR numbs the feeling of missing that someone.. When all sorts of communication breaks down, nothing physical could help and all the hiccups lead to deterioration..

I've seen many international friends doing this having just met one another online via discord, so I don't see why not.

even with all the "commitments", your relationship didn't work out? sounds like they weren't commitments then.

Hi Sifus,

I have just moved to Singapore (August 2022) last year, as I have gotten a good job opportunity here in Singapore. My girlfriend and I just started our relationship in late December 2021, and after short 8 months, I flew to SG to work. I still visit KL, once a month, for my family and her.

She is a single child, and because of her parents (slightly aged), she could not move to Singapore to work, plus, she mentioned that she is afraid that she cannot cope with Singapore's work stress. I didnt force her either.

Recently, our argument always related to what happen after marriage, will I be still in SG? or MY? Personally, I never think of staying in SG until I die, but I still plan to build myself up in SG at least until 40+ years old ish. But then her concern would be what is the point of marrying, having kids, but I working in SG, while she take care of the kids and stuff (which she mention that she is scare of this as well).

At my currently age, I would say I am maybe 3 - 4 years to go before marriage, and not sure if this is too early for us to discuss stuff like this? FYI, we are at the same age.

Need some advice.

Thanks.

LDR is never easy even if you guys are in different states.

She is not wrong in mentioning in handling the family alone when you are in SG. i had that problem when i am working in KL and wife in Melaka. although i go back weekly, she is the one taking the kids for monthly checkup, taking care of household. my mum is there to cook and take care of kids but mentally, you need to be there as well... my wife had to bring my 1st kid to school while on maternity leave just because i cannot take leave to go back...

not forgetting about emergencies, who is going to be there when theres an emergency?

so, you want her to be stay at mom full time? 8 months only already talk about marriage lmao

TS, she is not wrong. What is the reason to be together when the other half always not around ? You are suppose to journey this life together if you plan to get married. If the other half can do all the thing on his/her own, the relationship or the marriage has no meaning at all. Either one of you need to compromise.

My prediction, it will not work if you don't have intention to come back to Malaysia or she have no intention to go to Singapore. Unless you have plan to work at Singapore for a short term & will eventually come back. However, based on my observation so far, 10 out of 10 ppl going to Singapore, non of them coming back to Malaysia because the currency exchange / earning power. Once you are used to Singapore working environment, your growth & network will be based on Singapore, it will become even harder for you to come back.

If neither one of you can compromise, see thing in the girl's angle. Don't hold her back coz her youth limited, it will be best to let her go.

My advise is being her over to Singapore. Yes you can bring the parents over once you are both PR.

I know of one financial blogger who did the above.
He bring his whole family over (him and his wife)
https://stestocksinvestingjourney.blogspot.com/?m=1

Another financial blogger (Indonesia chinese) became PR, got kids and bring parents over. If I am not wrong this is the person.
https://www.3foreverfinancialfreedom.com/

You can contact the above bloggers for more information.

It's going to be difficult but it can be done. Yes you need to seat down talk to her about it. There's no escaping it. Only talk to her if you are very sure she's the one. Or else forget about it. Forget about it means cut the relationship.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jan 17 2023, 07:04 PM

2nd generation PR need to do national service. If decided stay in SG for long, better take up citizenship.

Bring whole family to SG is not cheap. Maybe relocate to JB while u work in SG. Flexibility of travel when needed to back JB.

GF did ask the right question. Do not waste her time if you cannot be decisive.