(Scene with the Chief of Defense and moustache National Security advisor guy)

National Security guy: "Sir, you may not believe this footage I'm about to show you. So far, we have kept this information witheld and top secret."
Chief of Defense: "Show me."

(National Security guy opens his laptop and presses a button.)
(Footage rolls of the National Security guy in drag, dancing in a gay nightclub and singing "My Way")

Chief of Defense: "My God..."

National Security guy: "Uh, sorry sir - wrong footage." (Presses a button) "As you can see, the Beagle 2 mission broadcast an extra 3 minutes footage - this is what the global media didn't see."

(Footage of Mars. A robot, in drag and wearing pink sunglasses, dances around singing "My Way" before stomping on the camera).
Chief of Defense: "My God..."
---------------------------------------------------------
Love scene: Sam and Mikaela are in his new 'car'.

Sam: "Uh, actually this is not the sort of thing I normally do, I mean I don't want you to think -"

(They both notice the gear stick in the car is increasing in length)

(Cut to outside the car/Bumblebee. Sex music plays and car/Bumblebee bounces up and down. Optimus Prime and several of the other Autobots are watching from the cover of a nearby cornfield.)

Jazz: "Hah, that Bumblebee. I hope he lubricates himself afterwards!"
Optimus: "Autobots! From this day forth -"
Ratchett: "Quiet, Prime. He might hear us! This sure beats the hell out of pretending to be an ice-cream van somewhere in Utah."
Jazz: "That was you, was it? I thought it was weird how those kids standing around the ice-cream van were -"
Optimus: "Silence!"

(Megatron and several Decepticons appear)

Megatron: "Bwahahahahaha! Now the Autobots shall truly be screwed. I have recorded footage of this incident and shall post it on on Youtube!"

Jazz: "Youtube? One of your new followers, huh?"
Ratchett: "Keep up with the times, Jazz. It's a website."
Optimus: "Megatron, your foul schemes shall never come to fruition! The Autobots will -"

Sam (completely naked) "Can you keep it down out there?"
Jazz: "As long as you can keep it up in there!" (Snickering from Autobots)

Mikaela (also completely naked) "You robots should really go somewhere else. This is our planet after all!"

(Bumblebee growls, opens both doors and ejects Sam and Mikaela. The Autobots and Decepticons start an enormous fight, demolishing nearby fields and rolling over and over until they disappear into the distance.)

Sam: "Well, I guess we better get our clothes back on."
Mikaela: "Absolutely. I think they're in the car -"
(Sam and Mikaela look at each other)
Sam: "which just turned into an alien robot and ran off somewhere -"
Mikaela: "Oh......... *beep*