Jun 10 2006, 01:02 PM, updated 20y ago
dunnno if this is a repost but here goes
Message: BONUS QUESTION ON CHEMISTRY
EXAM
The following is supposedly an actual question
given on University of
Washington chemistry mid-term.
The answer by one student was so "profound" that
the professor shared it with colleagues, via the
Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the
pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat)
or endothermic(absorbs heat*)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs
using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and
heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is
changing in time. So we need to know the rate at
which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at
which they are leaving. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not
leave, therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look
at the different religions that exist in the world
today. Most of these religions state if you are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since
there is more than one of these religions and since
people do not belong to more than one religion, we
can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to increase
exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change
of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states
that in order for the temperature and pressure in
Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to
expand proportionately as souls are added. This
gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate
at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature
and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and
pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which
is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa
during my Freshman Year that, "it will be a cold
day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into
account the fact that I slept with her last night,
then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure
Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has
frozen, it follows that it is not accepting any more
souls and is therefore, extinct... leaving only
Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine
being, which explains why, last night, Teresa kept
shouting "Oh my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
hell, the temperature
Quote
the person who gave this answer 
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