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Some jokes I've got from forward email ..., Maybe you've read before
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OnePageMemory
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 Apr 29 2004, 06:17 AM
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| QUOTE (Sheep319 @ Apr 18 2004, 01:46 AM) | Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of
her first-grade pupils.
"Johnny, what is your problem?"
Johnny answered, "I'm too smart for the first
Grade.
My sister is in third grade and I'm
smarter than she is! I think I should be in the
third-grade too!"
Ms Brooks had had enough, so she took
Johnny to the principal's office. The principal
agreed that he would give the boy a test and if
he failed to answer any of his questions he was
to go back to the first-grade and behave.
He started by asking Johhny some simple
arithmetic.
"What is three times three?"
"Nine, Sir."
"How much is nine times six?"
"Fifty-four."
And so it went with every question the
principal thought a third-grade should know.
The principal looked at Ms Brooks and
said, "I think Johnny can go to third grade! He
seems smart enough."
Ms Brooks said to the principal, "Let me
ask him some questions?"
The principal and Johnny both agreed.
Ms Brooks asked, "What does a cow have
four of that I have only two of?
Johnny, after a moment, answered "Legs, Ma'am"
"What is in your pants that you have but
I do not have?"
"Pockets!"
"OK, what does a dog do that a man steps into?"
"Pants."
"What starts with a C and ends with a T,
is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin
whitish liquid?"
"Coconut."
"What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft
and sticky?"
The principal's eyes opened really wide
and before he could stop the answer, Johnny was
taking charge.
"Bubblegum!"
"What does a man do standing up, a woman
does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?"
"Shake hands, Ma'am."
"Now for some "Who am I" sort of
questions, OK?
First one. You stick your poles inside me, you
tie me down to get me up, and I get wet before
you do."
Johnny, quick as ever, answered, "Tent!"
"OK, a finger goes in me. You fiddle
with me when you're bored. The best man always
has me first."
The Principal was looking restless and a
bit tense.
But Johnny was on the ball with "Wedding
Ring!"
"I come in many sizes. When I'm not
well, I drip.
When you blow me, you feel good."
"Nose."
"Right, I have a stiff shaft, my tip
penetrates, and I come with a quiver."
"Arrow."
"Good, now for the last one. What word
starts with an 'F', ends in K', and means a lot
of heat and excitement?"
Firetruck, Ma'am!"
The principal breathed a sigh of relief
and said to the teacher, "Send him to
university, I got the
last ten questions wrong myself!!" |
posted b4 i think
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