My Dear Wife,
You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you with your 54 years can no longer supply. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore after reading this fax, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don't be perturbed I shall be back home before midnight.

When the man came home, he found the following letter on the dining room table............

My Dear Husband,
I received your fax and thank you for your honesty. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54
years old. At the same time I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael my tennis coach, who like your secretary, is also 18 years old. As a successful businessman and with your excellent knowledge of Math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference.

18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18.

Therefore I will not be back before lunchtime tomorrow.

WHY SINGAPOREAN Girls CAN'T WIN MISS UNIVERSE TITLE

One of the main reasons why in recent years the Singapore
Government has always ensured that their Miss Universe
representative
were of tertiary level education or higher was because of
the following incident which occurred not too many years ago.

It is the final round of the Miss Universe Pageant and
the 3 finalists, Miss USA, Miss Malaysia and Miss
Singapore are being asked 3 simple questions:

MC: The first question is name me an electrical
appliance starting with "L"
Miss USA: Lamp
Miss Malaysia: Light bulb
Miss Singapore: LADIO
Judge: No, no, Radio does not start with the letter "L"

MC: I am going to give you 3 more chances; Now, name
me an animal starting with the letter "L"
Miss USA: Lion
Miss Malaysia: Leopard
Miss Singapore: LABBIT
Judge: No, no, no!

MC: Your next chance. The name of a famous car that
starts with "L"
Miss USA: Lexus
Miss Malaysia: Lamborghini
Miss Singapore: Lolls-Loyce
Judge: Oh my God!

MC: I am going to give you one last chance! Name me a
fruit starting with the letter "L"
Miss USA: Lemon
Miss Malaysia: Lychee
Miss Singapore, with full of confidence, smiles and
says: LIEWLIAN!!

This is not the end of the story, the Judge consulted the
board of judges to determine if Miss Singapore should
really be disqualified ; and they decided that since Miss
Singapore was having so many problems with the letter "L",
they decided to give her another chance.

Judge: OK, the final question is : Name me a human
anatomy starting with the letter "L"
Miss USA: Lung (applause)
Miss Malaysia: Liver (even more applause)
Miss Singapore: LAN CIAU
The Judges fainted..!!!