Hey girls what do think about girls and ego?
Do we need ego or just throw it away. Btw how do we throw our ego away?

Strong ego invoke many different kinds of emotions such as Fear, Jealousy, Attachment, Hate, and to greater extent invoke fights, wars etc, and harm both urself and people around u or people u're to be with.


Simple ways to gradually throw away the strong self-ego, including:-

- everyday tell ourselve to throw away Illusion, Self-centred ego and Mindset of differenciation; this would need long term practice because ego in each of us were accumulated since very very long time beyond human imagination

- find 10 to 15 min time, say, before sleeping every day, to do simple meditation; that is to sit down in a quiet place, close ur eyes and focus ur mind just in the breathing.
Count ur breathing -- breath in, breath out.
This would help u to find peace within urself, and in turns help u to transform the self-centred ego into wisdom mind that can assist others who need help.


- practice daily to tame ur emotion, example everytime before get angry over something, step back and take some deep breath, then think again and u might find that it's not necessary to get angry over those things.

- observe around, read around about life beings who are suffering in many different kinds; those sufferred emontionally, physically, got abused, sufferred from hunger, homeless .. etc.

This would help u to develop Compassion and thus gradually throw away the self-centred-ego.


In fact above apply not only for female, but for male as well.

thanks..that was really great answer

I really like the first 3 points that you made. Im going through a lot right now, so this was helpful for me.

hi lilmisz and Serene, appreciate ur comments. juz among the things i learned and gone thru.

other ways to help transform the "self-centred" ego to something that is "others-centred" wisdom, including,
whenever we're blamed for something, or when we have conflict with people around us, we could practice to step back, pause, and do a little soul-searching, think about was it anything we previously had sad or done that hurt the others, and thus when the right time come the others maybe intentionally or unintentionally would do back the same to us.

Conflict is among the good scenarios for us to practice soul-searching, develope compassion and peace, and most importantly, to express remorse towards people who had conflict with us because it must be always our fault first then only people would strike back, and this become a chain reaction, never-endingly, across time and space.

Thus, besides daily practice to feel grateful for what we're having, to feel for other's suffering, the other helpful steps is to feel "remorse" -- means feeling apology from the bottom of our heart -- to all the life beings, be in animals or human, that we've intentionally or unintentionally hurt, and to ask for their forgiveness, and that from now on we all live in peace with each other.

it's a really tough practice because our mind tend to be most of the time be marred by the illusion and self-centred ego, thus unable to see thru the real things behind. But with consistent practice, it's possible for us to purify the thoughts and then turn it into wisdom, and so that we can have more peace with ourselves and with others.

very good points made. When someone asks me how do we find joy when suffering, I tell them :"It's easy to become joyful when you realize it's all just illusion." Human beings suffer because of worldly greed. Most of us are blinded by ignorance, believing that the ego-self "I" exists and is permanent. However, nothing that exists does not change. Anything that does not change, does not exist.

Thus, the nature of the universe is impermanent. Anything that exist, will always change. Most of us become restless and in agony from the burden of greed and desires. Desires are fires that burn. Imagine a person who grabs a torch and runs into the wind. Eventually, they will end up burning their arms with the torch and even engulfing their whole body in flames. Desires are like the ocean- they can never be filled up.

Why is there ego? Ignorance, attachments, and cravings are the three poisons that blinds us. With materialism becoming dominant, people become delusional and get attached to material objects. They crave for things that they do not have, and neglect the things that they already have. Hence, they are always suffering in life, chasing after their desires and attachments.

Therefore, in a world filled with injustice laws and lies, people struggle with the thoughts of desire for pleasure. We forget to live in the present moment, and to appreciate what we already have. Once we understand this, we are able to dissolve away from the ego-self.

When dealing with others, always show patient tolerance. If other people hurt us, we should tell ourselves :"This is because he/she could not help themselves", or "This is only because of my mistakes in conduct that have led to such happenings". Tell yourself:" They are messengers bringing me lessons in cultivation and allowing me to train my ability to tolerate adversity patiently."