From a guys point of view......

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says:

I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying:

"Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out:

"No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?" I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that biotch knows I'm smarter than her.

This post has been edited by -=Axis=-: Apr 20 2006, 12:29 AM

That oughta teach em!

very nice technique....hehe....

Holy Shiat. Nice work there.

style2...........bro

WOW!

you are the man bro ...

/salute to the MAN!

I like what you did.
But I believe you won't have sex for the next few nights at well.

HAHAHA! Good Technique..but good defensive work from the gal (frm getting laid) as well

omg.

In gamers terms, we dub this PWN3D!

So pwn3d. So so pwn3d. Awesome stuff there ^.- Devious indeed!

power........... keng.
into celibacy u will go.

pwn'd!

Got to try it...

saw many in the net...

This post has been edited by ninjamerah: Apr 20 2006, 01:09 PM

revenge is a dish best served COLD

No money, no honey dude... You win the fight, but you loss the war...

Now your left and right hand is your ONLY best friend...

nice article.
i like it. unexpected turn of events.

exactly my thoughts

u might have saved your pride but u have nothing else

on the other hand...this is a joke so no need to take it too seriously

eh.. Za dao.. I thought it was Axis himself who faced this situation until I read what you all said.

Didn't notice, this is Jokes Heaven.