What does death mean to you?
The idea of death doesn't scare me more than it used to be before. Previously I was afraid of death because our consciousness will simply gone, erased from history and we have no idea what happens to the world after that. I think some philosophers called this angst, the anxiousness of death since death reconsiders attitude towards life, how insignificant it is. When I was young, I believed that since life is insignificant - it is therefore an utmost important cause to leave a mark in history, because history is the only way that reaffirms your existence. Think of all the lives before this, the poor and the unfortunate, they never had a chance to tell their story - I mean who hears from them anymore?

Therefore death played a big part in organizing my world view, that our perception towards the world is insignificant. Death made me think that life is like a stage or a movie, and we're our own main actor and how significant the play is depends on your actions. Why I said that death doesn't scare me anymore is the fact that like a movie; it doesn't really matter if it is short or long - what really matters is the significance of the movie. You direct your own movie, whether it is a comedy, drama, tragedy or even action is up to you. Since nobody likes a boring movie, I always tried my best in all the actions in my life, especially education and career to make it significant and interesting. If it is a short movie, then I'll be comfortable thinking that I did my best; just like the feeling you convinced yourself you did your best in an exam. If it is a long movie, I hope in the long time frame I have achieved sometime significant or memorable, so that the movie is remembered in history.

Death has also led me to think that money is not an ultimate answer for everything. It is good to have money, it is not good to base your life on it. I mean what do you really get from money? You will never bring materiality to your grave. If you did let your kids inherit your wealth, it won't last few generations. Therefore I despise people that think money is everything, people that keep thinking how much salary they will get or how much profit they will gain.

On contrary however, there is the other side of my world view. It is a rather selfish world view, I think. Because in the end in a movie the only important thing is what the main actor do, not other actors. Therefore I have this mindset that I don't pay much care or attention on what other people did, because it doesn't really matter. And I also will stubbornly refuse to learn anything that I think is useless or a waste of my time, cooking for example. I already figured this out since I'm young, and I was pretty sure that my world view that life is a movie is quite original. But in essence, death played a major part in formulating this world view of mine.

Where do you think your meaning/idea of death originated from?
From a secular point of view, that there is really nothing left when we are dead. From history too, because dead people in the past are not even remembered in history, what is the point of life? This thinking sometimes lead me to a point of view that herostradic fame is quite rational, if you never heard: Herostratus burned down Temple of Artemis (one of Seven Ancient Wonders) to become famous. He is punished to death, but at least his name is recorded in history, will your name be even recorded in history?

I read a lot on philosophy too, and become very interested in existentialism. Like Kierkegard said, we are responsible for finding meaning to our own life. Therefore I think that passion for your career is very important, if not you will be doing something you don't like for the rest of your life. In the end your life becomes meaningless and boring. And remember, nobody likes boring movies.

The most important influence I guess is my appropriation that life is a movie. It makes me think that how long or short your life is, doesn't matter. Somehow the same idea is also reflected back by Shakespeare and de Barca's ideas that life is a stage.

What emotions/feelings do you experience when you think about death?
To be honest, now I don't fear death. I doesn't matter to me when it comes. Maybe the only feeling is that I'm satisfied that I have done my best in life, well like what you feel in exams. Some people find my attitude towards death scary, they ask what about your family? Well, for me your relationship towards your family is as best as you want them to regard you after death. Like for me I try to fill good memories and less bad ones with family members because I want them to remember the good ones after my death. But not mourning for forever, just remember me is enough. How about your future marriage, your future grandchildren? Well, it comes to me that my meaning in life is not to bring over my genes or bearing children. Therefore that is not as important, at least what I think.

Can you share any personal experiences that you connect with death?
I have seen my relatives passed away, not literally though. And the idea that they are now nothing reinforces what should I do about life. Also, I try to remember good memories with them, since memory is now the only thing that stores their existence. Also I think that they would not want me to mourn them for too long, and that's how it is going to be too when I die.

As all of us have, I also learned that death is an everyday thing, accidents in real life or news stories still affirm that we don't decide when we die. Not even if you live healthily. Death comes whenever it wants to come, so it I feel assured that I already thought a great deal about them. The other day I read that a working father died defending his home and family from robbers. Some said they would rather give all the money so the robbers won't kill them, but I am comfortable thinking that I died defending from robbery. So yeah, now I don't fear death as much as other people do.


Age: 21
Gender: Male
Race: Chinese
Religion: Agnostic