extra note: jhana is very achievable, please try it. won't take a lifetime too, a year will do even if you believe you're 'untalented.'

no regular practice how to be good, hahaha.

just remember that even for one breath while in samatha, for that one breath you're in concentration. then you keep up with the second breath, then the third, then the fourth.

don't put those stories in your head la. jhana is not that mystical, just creating a new habit in your head like learning how to play football.

yea, usually very hard solid jhanas once you come out of retreat then worry about wife/girlfriend, kids, paying bills, what clothes to wear, what movies to watch will affect the thoughts that come up during your sit.

but it's important to know what concentration feels like at the very least so when you vipassana you'll know if you're in lethargy and just drifting in thoughts. that's true for me doing mahasi noting at least, other people may have different experiences.