Hello there..just really want to konw what it mean by 'teman tapi mesra'??not that Ratu song..i mean what is it in our relationship..i'm asking that kind of question because..my special friend keep answering that word.."we just teman tapi mesra.." she said..every time if i ask about our relationship..same answer she gave to me..but i don't know what she mean by that ..help me..
hope u all can help me find the answer..


[edit] so..thanks for comment in this topic so next step..what should i do??need really great advise..

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 7 2010, 07:37 PM

teman = friend

tapi mesra = close

she treat u as a close friend only

aiyak..just as a closed friend..but i really love her..she also says that she love me when i'm force him to answer about our relationship..sometime she "rasa bersalah" to me...that mess me up..

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 6 2010, 05:24 PM

she really like u..
she really love u..
she love to spend time with u..

but.. as a fren oli.
that is wat "teman tapi mesra".
go find other gurl.. there are many chicks out there.. juz keep lookin.
u will find 1.

i always think teman tapi mesra is the stage where more than a friend, but less than a lover.

which means she might like you, but dunwan to be chained to you as your gf.

just fren..

Nazanto>hard to forget her lo..3 years relationship...her parent also know about our relationship..my parent also know..but to her..i'm just her closed friend i'm giving everything to her..to make her love me..but she said 'we just teman tp mesra'
emino>i think u r right..but..as u say like that..sometime i'm asking her why she don't want to be my gf..she just trying to open new topic..but..she so friendly to me..almost everyday she will talk to me or replying my sms..

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 6 2010, 05:40 PM

That somehow shows that she doesn't want to commit into any serious relationship yet but still maintain a close contact with you.

Macam FuBu la.

BlueWind>yeah..i think its true man..
igor_is300>FuBu??aiyak..not that la..she's not that kind of person..huhu
so...if she just treat me as a closed friend or another word that u mention before..what should i do next??try to make her fall in love at me or what??really need good solution..

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 6 2010, 06:33 PM

dalam konteks bahasa indonesia..teman tapi mesra actually mean... a skandal..an affair.. itu yang sebenarnya... u can do anything but not up to the extend u can marry her...

teman sahaja, teman biasa, bukan teman wanita, tetapi mesra, sangat mesra sehingga boleh bermesraan.. adakah ini...


FUBU?

---

Added on February 6, 2010, 6:50 pmtry to "test water". hold her waist...hand raba-raba a bit..move slowly to the mountains/hills.... if she slaps you, means not fubu.

kidding. don't try.

This post has been edited by toda_erika_II: Feb 6 2010, 06:50 PM

sorcerer>thanks for the info..huhu..
toda_erika_II>not that mesra...just word 'teman tp mesra'..aiyak..since i know her..i'm not the person who always 'mengambil kesempatan'.
i love her so much..just she didn't realize that..what should i do..

simple

its look like are couple but it not

use five steps

are you muslim? if not, then can make use of 14 feb. if yes, any day will do.

which day it doesn't matter.
just let her know "dowan to be teman tapi mesra. want to be teman lelaki/suami hahaha.

ok ok i better get serious.
there's a saying says "never try never know". try to court her lol if you really really love her.

toda_erika_II>funny lol..i tried before..but..she just keep away from the topic..but..2 or 3 time..she reply with positive answer..
kintsuchi>aiyak..i'm not a person who can 'pura-pura' about relationship..
eb0nY & iv0ry>what step??

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 6 2010, 07:02 PM

hmm maybe give her more time and see how thing goes.

toda_erika_II>3 years old our relationship bro..how many years she need....aiyak..onemorething..when she think she boring..she will sms me..n ask me to cheer her up..
Lollypop7>never tried to use that method..but..u just guess that..i'm speechless.. ..am i not a good person for her..just she know it...

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 6 2010, 07:31 PM

can't help. wait for someone more experienced here to help

just be straightforward with her and ask if u r her bf.. but my guess is she's just keeping you around while waiting for a better guy..

Teman tapi mesra= very close friend. She treats you as her closes friend, but not yet to the extent of getting into relationship.
There's no way you can force her, unless she's ready.

aku punya teman... Teman sepermainan.. Ah ah ah~


Lol.

On a serious note, i think you should start giving hints that you like her. How? I dunno. Send some sms that forces her to think and ponder about the relationship you guys are having.

What you can do now is just keep it as the way it is and try not to push her. Otherwise you will be ended with her avoiding you instead. If you are willing to wait for her, carry on. But at the same time, don't restrict yourself to one option and be open.

it means fubu

Come lah Ts, another way of doing it .
Trial and error method= Just try your very best to be physically attached and hold her hand .

YoungMan>3 years n she not ready yet??aiyak..
Ikhwan Aziz>tried it before..but as usual..no positive answer..n the answer always the same..'teman tp mesra'
BlueWind>thanks..i think i will wait her..but..just wait??don't do anything??
olman>FuBu again??aiyak..
UnchainedLullaby>tried to hold her hand before..she not refused..we just like a couple..but ..we just 'teman tp mesra'

some gals just simply like the way things are and refuse or afraid to change it... some gals want to see how guys will change...

t3chn0m4nc3r>good to hear your advise...reply my pm bro..thanks..
Evangelista>yeah..teman just teman..but when i'm asking about serious relationship..he said..just wait n c..good sign or what?? nothing i can do??hoping till the end or what??that what i want to know.because..although she said just teman tp mesra..but..she just want me to pay more attention to her..

This post has been edited by olen: Feb 7 2010, 10:25 AM

Jangan berangan lebih ya boy? Teman is still teman, nothing more. She said like that because she don't want to mislead you or giving you false hope.

Not really don't do anything literally la whatever you do, just keep it moderate, know the limit. You can continue shower her with gifts and stuff but don't get too carried away.

You've got PM...

Hi there! so how is it going? I just want to comment on this. Hehe.. if u r already be with this girl, good! if not then perhaps I can somehow enlightened u with what I think in this situation..?

I am also a girl that does not like to be chain. I am just afraid of the change in relationship. I dont want to be one that say "love you" and then if the relationship does not work, I have to convert to say things that normally friends do.
Some girl, dont want to be chain by a relationship like a girl friend and boyfriend kinds. I am for one, loves my freedom. By having bf can only mean that I have to call everyday and cant even be caught looking at other guy or else i felt guilty. Even if i am not looking at guys, the relationship thing makes me feel less freedom.
Some girls, afraid of commitment. Cause they already had told themselves that they will be trully loyal and wont waver by anything once they found that special someone..

I fall to the category of all the above. I know if the guy likes me and before he even launces his move, I avoided it. Like this girl, she changes topic cause she know ur feelings. less trouble of professing ur love but u need to spell the L-O-V-E word to her....

What u can do... I am no expert in love, but if somehow this girl is like me.. then this will be a good advice...

1. do what bf/gf do... hold her hand if u have the chance, hug her occasionally, say "ilu" often.. just show that u care for her... but dont overdo it... ^^"
2. make her misses u.

3. if u feel that she loves u the way u loves her, make her a little jealous... (this is a little dangerous... but usually quite effective.. but hmmm since idk her personality, better do it if u r REALLY REALLY sure of her feeling) like when she caught u talking with another girl, and shes somehow jealous. Explain urself that she was just only friends.. even if shes not jealous, explain urself... this will stir her feeling..

4. seek help from parents/friends. (ask them to recommend u or let her think about u often by bringing u into her conversations when she is with others.)
5. show ur other self... (this will give her feeling.. "ah, there are another interesting side of him that i dont know" and makes her wants to be with you more often...)
6. be decisive. (that u want her to be ur girl.. be a little jealous/ show that u r a little hurt when shes with other guy, dont feel "ah.. she still can choose whomever she wanted, shes still free.. so I should be considerate when shes talking abt other guy or seen walking with other guy.." u must be affirm of ur goal; wanting her to be ur girl..) [idk if u will get this point but well, worth the try..] usually girls this time either know what she wanted or indecisive about the relationship... so u must be the one that take charge...

but at the same time, if u know that she has not have any of "that" special feeling for you in the progress, maybe its time for u to move on?
7. give her the freedom she needs.. ask her why she does not want to be in the relationship with you (somehow bargain ur way through it?)
8. be someone strong and reliable when she has problem (but also show ur weak and how u r dependent of her at times.. this will deepens the bond..)

I hope this helps.. but that is all that i can think of..
It was almost 3 years, so shes definitely someone u really loves... well, if u r able to steal her heart.. i think she's going to be a keeper.. Good luck! hehe.. oh.. try only some of the above.. that u r confident doing.. Confidence is the key, so be confident in front of her about ur feeling towards her (even if u r not..).

maybe its the opposite!

Teman = friend
mesra = sex

Teman tapi mesra = friends with benefits

wow...nice guide sealyx...

as much content as that post had...dont necromance old threads, as the TS is not here by now, and likely his query answered. unless its a discussion thread then maybe can necro