I wrote this article by myself, mainly due to the fact that the amount of stupid things that go around the gym and forums has finally gotten to me. I hope you guys enjoy it, and maybe learn a thing or two. Please feel free to leave constructive feedback regarding both the writing and also about the content itself. If the feedback is good, I might continue with this. Thank you.

Questions and Answers

1) The human body only has chest muscles, ab muscles, and bicep muscles.
- Wrong

2) You mean there’s more than chest abs and biceps?
- Just because you can’t or don’t see something, it does not mean that it does not exist. Which is why if you ran the red light, and a police officer stops you, telling him ‘Sorry saya tak nampak’ does not get you out of a ticket. However, saying ‘Ada cara lain kita boleh settle?’ might yield different results. Back to the topic, I suggest you get an anatomy book.

3) Yeah whatever, but chicks dig chest and biceps and of course a six-pack. The rest of the muscles are useless.
- Chicks do not dig muscles, they dig big cocks or money, preferably both (Mark Rippetoe).

4) Okay so you might be right, but I jog and play football/tennis/badminton, so I don’t need to train my legs.
- That’s equivalent to saying ‘I shower with my clothes on, so I don’t need to do my laundry’. Even professional football players playing at UEFA Champions League level squat more than 200kg (Hoff & Helegerud, 2004), and the last time I checked, you probably won’t make it into my kampung team. Here’s a hint: If you can fit into skinny jeans, then having legs that are ‘too big’ is probably the last thing you should worry about.

5) Why would I need to train my back? Not like I can see it anyway.
- Refer to question 2. Additionally, training your back muscles will lead to gains in bench press and also help put on mass on your arms.

6) Speaking of arms, bicep curls build big arms, so obviously doing more curls will give me better results, also known as HUGE ARMS?
- If I were to hit you on your head with a stick once, you would feel a certain level of pain. If I were to hit you on your head with a stick twice, you would feel double the amount of pain. However, if I were to hit you on your head 10 times, you would not feel 10 times the amount of pain. Conversely, you would feel no pain at all, because you would be dead. Huge arms are built FIRST by compound exercises. Squat, deadlift, bench, overhead press, chinups, and rows are just some examples. When you can move a respectable amount of weight in those exercises, then only it is time to focus on bicep curls.

7) Oh I see, hmm let me see…squat. Is that the exercise where you put the barbell on your back and go down 6 inches?
- The exercise you have just described would not be a squat, it would be called ‘an attention-whore pu$$y in the squat rack’. The barbell squat is an exercise where you’re supposed to go down as deep as possible. If possible, you’re supposed to go down all the way until your butt touches your calves. However, at the very minimum you should go BELOW PARALLEL.

8) How many times should the bar touch the floor while deadlifting? Any variations you care to share?
- A set of ‘deadlifts’ where the bar only touches the floor at the start of the first rep and at the end of the very last rep is not deadlifting. At the very least, the bar should touch the floor at the end of every rep, also known as the ‘touch and go’ style. A variation that is beneficial: If you train at a gym where the aunties talk and laugh as if the place belongs to them, use one of them as a substitute for the barbell. I would advise you to render them unable to speak first before beginning your set. Don’t afraid to be rough.

9) Is the bench press a 2 person exercise?
- Contrary to what usually passes for a ‘bench press’ in most gyms, a proper bench press is not a two person exercise. The person behind the bench is there as a ‘spotter’, which means he’s there to make sure that when you fail, the bar does not slam onto your throat. Unfortunately, many have used the spotter as a helper instead, which makes the bench press look like a 2 person exercise, where one person pushes and the other pulls throughout the entire set, while the person pulling keeps telling the person pushing that ‘ITS ALL YOU MAN! COME ON!’

10) One last question for now, is grunting on every rep and making a constipated face mandatory?
- If your intention is looking like a fool, then yes. If you grunt on the last few reps of your last set, then it’s perfectly natural. Grunting as if tomorrow is 2012 while you’re on your first rep of your first set of wrist curls however, is not.

11) Oh wait wait one more question sorry. Is it cool to drop dumbbells onto the floor so that it makes loud noises?
- Let me put it to you this way. If I could magically go through your monitor and enter your room, do you think it would be cool if I dropped your monitor onto the floor so that it makes loud noises? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

This post has been edited by Desvaro: Dec 6 2009, 08:32 PM