Nov 30 2009, 08:42 AM
QUOTE(theWinner @ Nov 30 2009, 09:05 AM)
Dad is highly regarded in my life!
While I was in MY, I spent 80% of my time with dad, the other 15% with seminar, talks and mum, while less than 5% with her.
Actually, I have tried to involve her in my activities. I always go swimming, golfing, sauna, and gym with Dad and his businessman friends. I spent about RM20,000 to get her a membership for Kelab Golf Diraja (on top of monthly fees no less than RM100) and also golf set.
"Next time, you two better get fast, people have been waiting. What did you two do, we are not going for party." Dad was referring to our wears.
"I'm sorry but she is not feeling well today, and I'm afraid I need to get her back."
Because she didn't really learn well, or may be interested with my activities, she seems to do fairly bad at times.
Yes, I agree, I was arrogant. I should find some times doing something that interests her rather than getting her to learn everything that I want her to do. Call me selfish.
I put myself in my dad's shoes. You don't make old dad unhappy, right? And, everyone has a single dad only. There is always tug of war between getting everyone happy.
Deep down, sometimes I yelled, "Could anyone understand my feelings? Who don't want to excel in both career and relationship?" And, sometimes, I'm just an intermediate in a tug of war between Dad and my GF, hope you see this.
I was a bit abusive that time, and if not my dad advice, I would be making things worst. I was irate, and kept thinking "Who you are trying to kid, little girl! I'm weak?! I'm going to show how weak you are!"... "I'm winner! I'm strong and powerful!"
I'm have no idea how this inner beast of mine crept in. But, believe me, I did nothing wrong physically, that was just something that gone a bit far in my mind.
So you chose your Dad/Career instead of her. It's amazing that she held on 8 years for you. While I was in MY, I spent 80% of my time with dad, the other 15% with seminar, talks and mum, while less than 5% with her.
Actually, I have tried to involve her in my activities. I always go swimming, golfing, sauna, and gym with Dad and his businessman friends. I spent about RM20,000 to get her a membership for Kelab Golf Diraja (on top of monthly fees no less than RM100) and also golf set.
"Next time, you two better get fast, people have been waiting. What did you two do, we are not going for party." Dad was referring to our wears.
"I'm sorry but she is not feeling well today, and I'm afraid I need to get her back."
Because she didn't really learn well, or may be interested with my activities, she seems to do fairly bad at times.
Yes, I agree, I was arrogant. I should find some times doing something that interests her rather than getting her to learn everything that I want her to do. Call me selfish.
I put myself in my dad's shoes. You don't make old dad unhappy, right? And, everyone has a single dad only. There is always tug of war between getting everyone happy.
Deep down, sometimes I yelled, "Could anyone understand my feelings? Who don't want to excel in both career and relationship?" And, sometimes, I'm just an intermediate in a tug of war between Dad and my GF, hope you see this.
I was a bit abusive that time, and if not my dad advice, I would be making things worst. I was irate, and kept thinking "Who you are trying to kid, little girl! I'm weak?! I'm going to show how weak you are!"... "I'm winner! I'm strong and powerful!"
I'm have no idea how this inner beast of mine crept in. But, believe me, I did nothing wrong physically, that was just something that gone a bit far in my mind.
But now that it's over, there's no point moping over it. Focus on your Career, make your Dad proud.
It's the path you have chosen after all, no ? Why doubt yourself now when you are so close ?
Relationships can wait.
Also, sorry to say this but any 16 year old punk out there with no money or career is a better boyfriend than you.
At least they spend more time and actually care for their girlfriend's happiness, instead of trying to meet
a rich successful Dad's unrealistic expectations.
I just hope that you learned a little something from this 'experience'... calling 8 years of cherished memories with her
a 'failure' is simply unacceptable. You're indirectly calling her a 'failure', do you realize that ?
LOVE IS NOT SOMETHING YOU HAVE TO PROVE YOURSELF TO YOUR FATHER, DAMMIT.
IT'S NONE OF HIS FARKING BUSINESS. IN THE FUTURE, ASSUMING YOU DO FIND A NEW GF, JUST LOVE HER AND KEEP HER HAPPY, IS THAT REALLY SO HARD ????
This post has been edited by Priapuseros: Nov 30 2009, 08:57 AM
Quote
Don't let your raw emotions override your logic, man. I think you know best that now is not the time, there's a distance factor *You're in NZ she's in MY*, and you have your Research to focus on. Priority No.1. Other stuff can wait. 
.... for example you could reconnect with her electronically (email/facebook/etc) and just keep in contact briefly, provided the first thing you do is apologize. Blame your dad if you have to, and use the sympathy card. It always works. This time, please KEEP MONEY AND FAMILY OUT OF THE LOVE EQUATION. Once you're done with Graduate School you can tackle her anytime, right ?? Why rush ? Hell, you could actually go for any other girl 
if only you weren't so attached to your 8-year-ex. 
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