Hmm, let me try to explain.

I am looking at Noobie's post entirely within its context, a better way of letting a girl know you like her, and thus I am limiting my critique to entirely within that sphere.

When you raise the bigger picture of course and say that this would only work if the girl is attracted to you, then yes of course I agree, but doesn't everybody take that for granted already? That attraction or its potential MUST exist for anything to progress in any way?

However, if you would say that having that having attraction is more important than Noobie's guide, this is where I would disagree.

I think that having attraction and also Noobie's guide has equal importance.

If you had attraction from a girl, but responded to it in the wrong way, there is a strong chance that you would immediately lose it.

And conversely it is entirely possible to create attraction out of thin air, even if a girl has not noticed you before.

So that's what I think.

---

Added on July 30, 2009, 7:11 pm+1

It's too bad I'm a barbarian that stares at breasts.

I can't help it. I love breasts so much. If I see them, I cannot stop staring.

This post has been edited by Dickson Poon: Jul 30 2009, 07:11 PM

Sorry mate, I disagree with you. By your rational, you can only approach girls who are attracted to you. That is of course, a ridiculous proposition. A lot of times when you approach someone you think is attractive, they probably don't know shit about you and probably don't think if you're attractive or not. You're just someone coming up to talk to them.

The 5 steps listed actually have underlying attractive qualities which women often look for in a man.

1) Eye contact - Confidence
2) Make her laugh - Interesting
3) Remember things she say - Attentive
4) Physical Proximity / Contact - Confidence / Experience
5) Ask her out - Initiative

If a lady is attracted to you, but you can't exhibit the above qualities, you'll lose that attraction real quick. Even if the girl has known you for some time, and you're both friends, the steps above help you break out of the dreaded friend zone. All friendships have their limits, and you have to cross them to get to the next level. With friends, its typically step 4 and 5.

If attraction is not there, you simply build it. A person can't choose to be attracted to you or not, so it doesn't hurt to show your best and do your best for the person you're interested in.

Guys, unknown warrior cannot be challenged by conventional means. Use your wits.

This post has been edited by Deadlocks: Jul 30 2009, 08:05 PM

+1

Anyway, step by step is the best way. if you're patient enough.

You're here too

polis kata jangan ...!! lol

I'm here for a different reason.

TS: There we have it^, the tl;dr summary.




Again, which came first? The chicken or the egg?


Glass half full, glass half empty.

Optimist vs Pessimist.


It doesnt freaking matter. You can tell people that attraction can be "built" by following those five steps if it makes you happy. This is simply not reality as I perceive it.

Steps 1-5 are valid though...and there is no harm trying to show your best to the person you're interested in.

If a girl doesnt find you attractive, no matter how well you do steps 1-5, she will still only see you as a friend. If you push too hard, she will be creeped and avoid you! Put yourself in the girl's shoes. What if a really ugly girl starts showing romantic interest in you? What would you do? She's a goody 2 shoes who is an angel and makes you laugh. She is interesting. She communicates well with you. She is culturally compatible with you... but she is so very dead ugly that you couldnt EVER imagine seeing her naked. What would you do? All the "nice" female characteristics... personality, compatibility, etc... simply dont matter... There is no mutual attraction.

Also note that it is very hard to have confidence, to be interesting and to be empathetic if you proverbially "DONT HAVE A LIFE" (the topic my latest thread addresses).

You could tell very early on if a person is interested in you or not pretty much by the way they look and interact with you. Things are mutual... and in my opinion, just to progress beyond step #1 requires mutual attraction
.


That's why I keep on stressing that guys should only pursue girls they detect interest from (i am assuming that guys would only pursue girls they are interested in of course). It should be obvious as the light of day when a girl is interested in you. Once you detect interest...then proceed with step's 1-5 as TS is suggesting.

How well you proceed through each of those steps depends on the characteristics you correctly outlined above: confidence / empathy ("attention") / social skills ("make her laugh") etc.


oh and btw, those traits are not just "simply built". They take a solid foundation to build up over time...

This post has been edited by ezralimm: Jul 30 2009, 08:24 PM

i heard by touching urself b4 a date improves ur confidence oh .. is tat true

Wow cool discovery you have there. Err... tell me, what do you get out of this?

yes. that is true. the reason is simple. after u ejaculate you feel more relaxed. scientifically proven.

---

Added on July 30, 2009, 8:25 pmguilty pleasure.

This post has been edited by teongpeng: Jul 30 2009, 08:25 PM

Sexual kicks. I have a LYN:CC keyboard fetish...

ooh... yeah, typing makes me hot....

i have a question here, i failed step 5 before with this girl, but now it seems like i have done step 1,2,3 slowly... probably because last time she don't know me much and i straight to step 5... should i uhm proceed ?

IMO, ask yourself... truthfully....

Would she be romantically interested in you?

Put yourself in her shoes...look at yourself (figuratively lah...) in the mirror .

Step 1-5 do not guarantee or have any intention to make u suceed in getting a girl. Its merely a better alternative to the confession craze that is taking the kids by storm these days.

It takes longer and more ardous to do than the confession method. but its worth it. its safe. it increase your chance somewhat. it doesnt involve any commitment. it happen on its on sweet time. there is no pressure on both sides. minimal damage to ego in case of failure. minimal damage to friendship in case of failure. chicks dig you. your friends envy you etc etc and many more!

This post has been edited by teongpeng: Jul 30 2009, 08:39 PM

Do you have a real girl friend?

i'm not sure bout that, cause i'm asian, and she's half filipino half caucasian, so i really don't know if she will date asian now that she's more comfortable with me i wonder if i should ask her out.

Please do not ask her stupid things like that. You will look like a small kid who's unsure or neurotic about little matters.

I'm busy now but I'll get back on this later.

Race is irrelevant.


Love really is blind... but usually only when there is strong MUTUAL attraction.


Does she find you attractive?



All the steps mean nothing if she simply doesnt find you attractive.

i would never ask about something like that..

find me attractive hmm i don't know, i admit i'm not handsome but presentable when i'm not working, cos i work in a kitchen, i just wear cincai..
but i just can feel abit that she's trying to get my attention a lil bit or i perasan, i don't know =.=