#1. Ask yourself.
Take a long hard look at yourself in a mirror. Look at every candid photo of you on facebook/friendster. Know who you are. Listen to yourself speak in conversations. Watch videos of yourself projecting your voice to other people. This can be a very humbling experience...but facing the truth is the first step.

* Look in the mirror. Ask yourself: If I were a girl, would I date him?
* If I were a girl with options (read: a hot girl), would I date him?
#2. Make appropriate changes

I gotta admit, this thread isnt for everyone... But for a majority of people, just looking at candid videos of themselves is uncomfortable. You get to see yourself compared to other people.
Even if you dont know what girls want... you should know what you want.
and I am not just talking about physical characteristics here.
The whole "look at yourself in the mirror" was kinda rhetorical in a way.
Eg:

If the guy staring back at you in the mirror is an effeminate/feminine shy scrawny frail emo b1tch....

If the guy staring back at you in the mirror is an obese, disproportionate, lazy, smelly excuse for a human being...

If the guy you see in candid facebook videos cant even project his voice properly...slouches with no confidence and talks like a loser...
^realizing stuff like the above is the real motivator for change.
Some people really ARE deluded... but most arent. And  upon looking at themselves from a third person's view, will recognize their weaknesses.
I am far from perfect. But not too long ago I was very far from perfect ... seriously. The catalyst for change exists in self awareness.

would this apply to just making frens?

Agreed. If there is your "be yourself" point then what about the others? The others is about changing, not being yourself. All you gotta do is be  the best you can be. basically, enhance who you are, not who you are trying to be.

no need anything..

just talk and make she always smile and laugh when both of u talking something.. then the spirit will come...

then can make a date.. simple !!!!

mind her... i think she snapped as it may have hit a nerve.

Damn you're sadistic.

What's there to be happy about? 

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Added on July 28, 2009, 3:20 pmi was thinking like perhaps her ex had a similar attitude.
In reality i believe that there is nothing wrong with being self-confident, so long as you are not deluded.
ie. The mental sociopath who doesnt give a sh1t about everyone else is different from the thriving individual with lots of friends. The latter has people who look up to him and WANT to be his friend. Thus he chooses who he WANTS to hang out with... and chooses who he get's to know well. He has the social life and emotional support to be able to not really care about what some people think about him. (you know like how some people get really hurt when you bring up certain attributes they allegedly have)

mind her... i think she snapped as it may have hit a nerve.

I mention things point blank as i see it. I dont know how the hell you could interpret bland text as "triumphant"... If i were talking/speaking with expression, then maybe it's possible to say so from my tone of voice and body language... but this if fvcking text we're talking about...

and btw, "triumphant" isnt the word you're looking for   (there we go, another "smirk" for you)
Whateverla

";" + ")" also you can interpret as a "smirk".

defying emoticon convention to suit your twisted interpretation of things.

Dunno what to say liao.



I wonder what you'll interpret ":" + "p" as...

now you're talking about "guilty pleasure" ????

wait ar, let me google.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guilty_pleasure



okay, you're really losing me now. 

i bet many of us reading this thread is to enjoy the flame war. Bring it on !

TS, click on your profile and check out the pic on the far right . My first thought on your guide was an article listed in msn that you copied and pasted.

I have no doubt on your method. But changing and maintaining the healthy state may need a lil bit of determination.

I am a stutterer and it is so pain in the ass when it comes to speaking. Especially English